Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Mr Frosto,

I am writing this letter to draw your attention towards my career developement and helps me to move one step forward in my desired goal in terms of my career obligation.

Neverthless to say, I have started here as medical administrative assistant and gained exceptional amount of knowledge while working with such an excellent team along with multi-talented and experienced people.

However, having clinical background, I always fond of to work with doctors and patients as a clinical assistant. Owing to this, our clinic should definately get benefits while having both skills such as clerical and clinical in one person while experiencing staff shortage in one or other side.

In addition to that, I have learned many things while working here and leaving this clinic, definately unfair for me as an honest and loyal employee. Therefore, i woulf like to request you, if you can able to consider my request and help me to polish my clinical skills, it would be rea

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response covers all three bullet points required in the task instructions. You successfully mention what you have learned in your present job as a medical administrative assistant, suggesting how the company would benefit by combining both clerical and clinical skills during staff shortages, and explain your desire to stay within the company rather than leaving. However, the letter is cut off abruptly at the end, leaving the final sentence incomplete and preventing full development of the closing. Despite this truncation, all bullet points are discernible and addressed, aligning best with a Band 6.0 descriptor.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The letter maintains a reasonably coherent overall arrangement with a clear purpose established in the opening. You make use of cohesive devices such as 'Neverthless to say', 'However', and 'In addition to that' to link your ideas, although some phrasing is slightly unnatural or mechanically applied. Paragraphing is attempted, but the letter suffers from a lack of a proper conclusion due to the abrupt ending where the final sentence trails off unfinished ('rea'). Referencing is mostly clear, but the overall flow is occasionally hindered by abrupt transitions and grammatical awkwardness.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, demonstrating an attempt to incorporate less common workplace and medical terms such as 'administrative assistant', 'clinical background', 'clerical', and 'loyal employee'. However, there are several lexical errors and inappropriate collocations throughout the text, such as 'career developement' (spelling), 'always fond of to work' (awkward phrasing), and 'definately unfair' (spelling and phrasing). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to restrict the score to Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt at varied structures such as subordinate clauses ('Owing to this, our clinic should definately get benefits...'). However, there are numerous grammatical and mechanical errors present, including spelling mistakes ('developement', 'Neverthless', 'definately', 'woulf'), incorrect verb forms ('helps me', 'I always fond of to work'), and punctuation issues. The incomplete final sentence ('it would be rea') further demonstrates a lack of control over sentence completion. These errors frequently cause strain and place the response firmly in the Band 5.0 category.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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