Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to request a transfer to the mareketing department. I have been working with the company for two years now, I started my journey in the sales area as an associate. As I was pursuing my Masters in Marketing at the time, I was not eligible for marketing field job positions. However, I learned many skills in sales department such as time management, team work, professional communication skills, and proposal creations.

I believe my invaluable experience in the sales department would bring inevitable benefits. Team work and time management are the most crucial transferable skills which will support successful planning and execution of campaigns within deadlines. Additionally, excellent communication is vital to deal with clients and manage team efficiently. Moreover, my education in marketing field will not only fill the gaps but also provide me an opportunity to utilise theory based learning into real time projects.

I received an offer from the job placement centre from the school. However, I grew up with the company and learnt various lessons, I am looking bright future here. I would therefore appreciate if you could move me to the marketing department in the next year.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

DP.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The candidate has successfully addressed all three bullet points required by the prompt. First, they clearly stated what was learned in their present job, mentioning specific skills like time management and communication. Second, they explained how the company would benefit from the transfer, highlighting transferable skills and the application of marketing theory to real projects. Third, they explained why they do not wish to leave the company, noting that they have grown with the organisation and see a bright future despite receiving an outside offer. The tone is appropriate for a formal business letter, and all ideas are relevant and adequately developed to fulfil the task requirements, aligning well with the Band 7 criteria.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter is logically organised with a clear overarching progression from introducing the request to detailing past learning, company benefits, loyalty reasons, and a closing statement. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate each main idea. Cohesive devices are generally handled well, using transition words like 'Additionally', 'Moreover', and 'However' to link ideas. However, referencing and transitions occasionally feel slightly mechanical, and there is a comma splice in the second sentence ('...two years now, I started...'), which affects overall flow. Despite these minor flaws, the organisation remains clear throughout, meeting the expectations for a Band 6.5 or 7.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The candidate demonstrates an adequate and generally appropriate range of vocabulary for the task. They successfully utilise less common terms and collocations such as 'transferable skills', 'professional communication skills', and 'time management'. There are a few spelling and word choice errors, such as 'mareketing' in the opening sentence and 'proposal creations' instead of 'proposal creation'. Nonetheless, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended message precisely, and the errors do not impede communication. This performance fits comfortably within the Band 6 descriptor.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at varied structures such as concessive clauses ('As I was pursuing my Masters...') and relative clauses. There are, however, several grammatical inaccuracies and punctuation errors, including a comma splice in the first paragraph ('...two years now, I started...') and missing articles or preposition slips ('in sales department', 'marketing field job positions'). While these errors are noticeable, they rarely impede overall communication, and many sentences remain accurate. This balanced profile warrants a Band 6.0 score.

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