Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir,

I hope you are well .I am writting this letter to upgrade my position in your company.

My name is sneha shah. I am Web Developer in your company in it Department .

special my work is attend meetings and confirm website order and make website as per Client Requirment.I have 5 members team.we discuss all problem with team and get the solution .

I want to upgrade my positon in other department in our company . recently i passed AI course so I want to work in AI department in work on new projects .

I want to improve my career . I help to my team in every project .could you upgade my position in defferent department .

Thank you for giving a greate oppotunity to improve my knowlege and get new position .

I look forward to a positive outcome regarding this matter.

Thanking You,

Your Faithfully

Sheha shah

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses the three bullet points required in the task instructions, though the development of ideas is somewhat limited and basic. The writer mentions what they have learned and do in their present job ("attend meetings and confirm website order"), suggests a company benefit through acquiring new AI skills ("recently i passed AI course so I want to work in AI department"), and touches upon wishing to stay in the company to improve their career and help the team. However, the explanation regarding why they do not wish to leave the company is rather brief and blended with other points. The tone is appropriate for a workplace letter, and the purpose is clear despite the limited elaboration. According to the descriptors, the writer covers all parts of the task with relevant ideas, placing the response solidly in Band 5.5 to 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The letter exhibits a coherent overall arrangement with a clear purpose, but the formatting, paragraphing, and cohesion require significant improvement. Many sentences are abruptly broken into single lines or disjointed paragraphs, such as separating "My name is sneha shah" from the rest of the introduction, and isolating "i look forward to a positive outcome". Cohesive devices are minimal and sometimes inaccurate or missing entirely. Referencing is basic, and logical progression between sentences is frequently disrupted by choppy phrasing and punctuation errors. While the overall message can be followed, the structural organization falls short of higher bands. This performance aligns best with the Band 5.0 descriptors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating everyday workplace concepts such as "Web Developer", "it Department", "meetings", and "projects". However, there are noticeable limitations and frequent spelling errors, such as "writting", "Requirment", "positon", "upgade", "defferent", "greate", and "knowlege". Furthermore, word choice is often imprecise, such as using "upgrade my position" instead of "transfer to another department" or "internal promotion/transfer". Less common lexical items are attempted but lack correct collocation. These errors cause some distraction for the reader but do not entirely impede communication, which reflects the Band 5.0 descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple, repetitive sentence forms like "I want to..." and "I am...". Attempts at complex sentences are virtually absent, and punctuation and capitalization are weak throughout the text, including lowercase letters at the beginnings of sentences and missing spaces after punctuation marks (e.g., "well .I am"). There are frequent errors in verb forms, prepositions, and agreement, such as "in work on new projects" and "I help to my team". These frequent errors cause difficulty for the reader and reflect a heavy presence of basic structural inaccuracies, fitting the Band 5.0 descriptors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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