Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir,

I am writing this letter to inform you about expecting promotion in other department in our company for my career growth. I am working in the company since 2 years and i have experience in team work, leadership and other departments because i have worked there also whenever there was low work volume in our department.

I am capable for shift co-ordinator position from this warehouse associate. I know all of the workers in our company personally so it will be quite easy for me to schedule employees for different shifts . I am also able to retain team members for flexible schedule as per requirement. These are the reasons which can advantageous for company and i can also get the experience for my PR journey. It will be win-win situation for me and company as well.

I am not willing to leave the organization because i am comfortable to work here and i am enjoying the peaceful environment and career opportunities here.

I hope i will get this opportunity and hearing back from you soon.

Yours sincerely,

Manjit Kaur

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You have addressed all parts of the prompt successfully. You mentioned what you have learned in your present job, stating that you have gained experience in teamwork, leadership, and warehouse operations over the past two years. You also suggested how the company would benefit by explaining that your familiarity with workers will make shift scheduling easier and help retain team members. Additionally, you explained why you do not wish to leave the organization, noting that you enjoy the peaceful environment, comfortable workplace, and ongoing career opportunities. However, the tone shifts slightly towards personal motivations such as your PR journey, which is a minor irrelevance to the professional context. Overall, your ideas are relevant and cover all bullet points adequately, corresponding well to a Band 6.0 descriptor level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

Your letter has a coherent overall arrangement, and your ideas follow a logical sequence from your current experience to your proposed new role and reasons for staying. You have used basic cohesive devices such as 'so', 'because', and 'and' to connect your thoughts. However, paragraphing could be structured more effectively, as your second paragraph is quite dense and combines several distinct ideas. Referencing and cohesion are sometimes a bit mechanical rather than fluid. For instance, transitioning between sentences could be smoother with more varied connectors. These features align with the Band 6.0 descriptor for coherence and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully using terms related to workplace operations such as 'warehouse associate', 'shift co-ordinator', 'schedule employees', and 'flexible schedule'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation issues, such as writing 'expecting promotion in other department' instead of 'transfer to another department', and stating that your skills 'can advantageous' instead of 'can be advantageous'. You also repeated the word 'company' and 'department' several times. These inaccuracies place your lexical resource score at Band 5.5, as the vocabulary is minimally adequate with some noticeable errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as using 'so it will be quite easy for me to schedule...' and 'These are the reasons which can advantageous...'. However, your writing contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues. For instance, the lowercase 'i' is used repeatedly instead of capital 'I', and you wrote 'working in the company since 2 years' instead of the correct 'for 2 years'. Additionally, there is a missing auxiliary verb in 'can advantageous'. Despite these errors, communication is not impeded as your meaning remains clear throughout. This performance fits the Band 5.5 descriptor.

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