Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear manager,

I hope you are doing well.

My name is Ramandeep Kaur. I do job in your company from two years. I want to change my department for my career development in your company.

I learned so many things from my present job such as time management, collaboration, communication skills and many more.

If i change my department. It is beneficial for company and me as well because this department is related to my career. I will do hard work. I have more knowledge about this department. It is easy for me as well as company.

I do not leave the company becuase i learned so many things from this company. I got more experience from this company. All staff members are very good and helpful.

So, I request you that please change my department in your company which is beneficial for my career development.

Your sincerely,

Ramandeep Kaur.

Date 1 October 2026

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt, ensuring the reader understands the purpose of the letter. You have covered what you learned, such as 'time management, collaboration, communication skills', suggested how the company benefits, and explained why you want to stay in the organisation. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For instance, the section explaining the company's benefit is somewhat limited and repetitive ('I will do hard work. I have more knowledge about this department'), which keeps the development at a moderate level. To reach higher bands, every bullet point needs to be extended with more specific examples and deeper explanations rather than general statements.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter maintains a coherent overall arrangement with a clear letter format, opening, and closing. You have used basic paragraphing to separate different points, which helps the reader follow your message. Nevertheless, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing can be basic, relying heavily on repeated sentence subjects and simple connectors like 'So'. Furthermore, some sentences are fragmented, such as 'If i change my department. It is beneficial...', which disrupts the natural flow of ideas. To improve, you should use a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensure your sentences are linked smoothly without abrupt full stops.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating everyday workplace concepts through terms like 'career development', 'time management', and 'collaboration'. However, there are noticeable vocabulary and spelling errors, such as 'I do job' instead of 'I have worked', lower-case 'i', and 'becuase'. There are also awkward word choices and repetitions, such as 'I learned so many things from this company. I got more experience from this company.' To achieve a higher score, you need to use less common lexical items with greater precision and eliminate basic spelling mistakes.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response features a mix of simple sentence forms and a few attempts at complex structures. There are some grammar errors present, such as tense usage ('I do job in your company from two years' instead of 'I have been working...') and prepositional or structural issues. Fortunately, these errors rarely impede overall communication, and your meaning remains clear throughout the letter. To move up to a stronger grammatical band, you should incorporate a wider variety of error-free complex sentences and improve your control over verb tenses and time markers.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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