Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Mr. David,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing to express my concern regarding a change in my department. I have learned various effective techniques such as time management, team work, task completion before time line while working with this department.

Firstly, I would like to inform that i have recently discovered an incredible talent in myself about my designing skills. I have a keen interest in designing from the first day but due to some circumstances i was shifted to this department. I would like to request you to make my transfer to designing department. By shifting me to design department the company can also gain benefit because i will be better valuable assest for the company when i will work in that field in which i have speciality.

Furthermore, I would like to mention that i do not want to leave the company because the company has given me a huge platform to standout and even on my worst days the company has supported me a lot in different ways.

I would be grateful if you could assist me with this concern promptly. I am hoping to get a positive responce from you soon.

Yours Sincerely,

Aahana Sharma

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, successfully covering what has been learned in the present job, suggesting how the company would benefit from a department move, and explaining why the writer does not wish to leave the company. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. While the explanation of skills learned and the reasons for staying in the company are clear, the suggestion regarding how the company would benefit from moving to the design department is slightly repetitive and relies on the general assertion that the writer has a 'speciality' in that field. To reach a higher level, all bullet points would need deeper extension and more specific professional justification.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter maintains a coherent overall arrangement with a clear, polite opening and closing, and logical paragraphing that separates each part of the task prompt. Cohesive devices are used to guide the reader through the points, such as 'Firstly', 'Furthermore', and 'By shifting me'. However, some aspects of cohesion are a bit mechanical and referencing is occasionally slightly repetitive or less fluid than desired. The logical progression is present throughout, ensuring the reader easily follows the writer's career progression request, though more varied transition techniques would elevate the flow of ideas further.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their message about career development. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary and phraseology, such as 'career development', 'incredible talent', and 'valuable asset', though some word choices and collocations feel slightly unnatural, for instance, 'express my concern regarding a change' when requesting a transfer, or 'task completion before time line'. Furthermore, minor word form errors and spelling mistakes occur, such as 'responce' instead of 'response' and missing articles or capitalization errors like 'i', but these do not impede overall communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response demonstrates a reasonable mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing structures like 'I would like to request you to make my transfer' and 'By shifting me to design department the company can also gain benefit because...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as missing articles before nouns ('designing department', 'design department'), lowercase 'i' pronouns, and minor prepositional awkwardness. Nonetheless, these errors are relatively infrequent and rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to easily understand the intended meaning throughout the letter.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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