Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear sir,

When first time I exposed myself to the city life two years ago, I joined this reputed company. While worlking here I have learned a lot of things like it helped me to improve my communication and interpersonal skills. Now I want future career developement so I think it is important for me to work in different departments of this company.

It cannot be denied that while working here I improved my skills like dealing with diffrerent kind of people and learn to cooperate with people with different attitudes with patience and positivity. It made me more confident and also to be cooperative and supportive with fellow workers.

If I moved to other departments of this company it will also benefit the company as well as being in other departments I can easily handle the tasks of this department in other departments. so we need not to approach different kind of people who are from the outside.

As I have learned a lot of skills while working here so there is also a cordial relation with my fellow workers and the company too. So it is also hard for me to leave this company.

At the end I would like to say that it is important for me to move from here for future career develompment but I always be there for the company s sake and needs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt, ensuring the required bullet points are covered. You clearly mentioned what you have learned in your present job, such as improving communication and interpersonal skills. You also suggested how the company would benefit, noting that moving to a different department allows you to handle tasks internally without needing outside help. Additionally, you explained why you do not wish to leave the company by highlighting your cordial relations with fellow workers. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For instance, the section explaining the company's benefit is somewhat repetitive and vague, particularly when stating that you can 'handle the tasks of this department in other departments.' Expanding these points with more specific examples of transferable skills would lift your performance higher.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

Your letter shows a coherent overall arrangement and follows a logical structure suitable for a formal request. You have used paragraphs to separate your main points, starting with an introduction and moving through your learning, company benefits, and reasons for staying. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing is not always clear, which holds the organization back. For example, transition words are basic, and phrases like 'At the end I would like to say' feel repetitive or clunky. Furthermore, pronoun referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as in the third paragraph where the phrase 'the tasks of this department in other departments' lacks clarity regarding which specific roles are being discussed. Using a wider and more precise range of cohesive devices and ensuring smoother transitions between ideas will improve the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, demonstrating that you can communicate your basic message, but it contains noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling that reflect a limited range. You attempt some less common vocabulary, such as 'interpersonal skills,' 'reputed company,' and 'cordial relation,' which shows potential. However, there are several lexical inaccuracies and spelling mistakes throughout the text, such as 'worlking' instead of working, 'developement' instead of development, and 'diffrerent' instead of different. Phrases like 'When first time I exposed myself' are unnatural in collocated English. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they restrict your score because the range of vocabulary remains limited and repetitive, lacking the precision and flexibility needed for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional clauses ('If I moved to other departments...') and subordinate clauses. However, your grammar features frequent errors in sentence structure, verb forms, and prepositions that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. For example, 'When first time I exposed myself' is an awkward and grammatically flawed opening. You also have issues with subject-verb agreement and tense consistency, such as 'learn to cooperate' instead of learned, and missing auxiliary verbs in 'it will also benefit the company as well as being in other departments I can easily handle.' Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma splices and missing periods, such as running clauses together without proper separation before 'so we need not to approach.' To improve, you need greater control over complex sentence patterns and fewer basic structural errors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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