Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Manager,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing this letter to express my interest in a different department. I started in my current job years ago and now I feelit it is significant for my career development to move to an another department in the same company.

Currently I am working in an Omni department and I learned many things while working at this department such as how to collect products from each aisle and arrange the items like frozen, bakery, prouce items in a various categories, if the product is not available in the store, I am trying to to give the substitutions with the permission of customers and so on.

I would like to move to cashier department because of several reasons. First reason is that, my background is finance and I perfectly know how to handle the cash and checking counterfiet money. Another reason is thet I am a social butterfly I love to talk with customers, also I can manage ifthe customer is rude. These skills are would definitely benefit from moving to a cashier department.

Furthermore, I do not wish to leave the company because this company is extremely helpful to learning new things and growing gradually in my life. I wish tho continue my service till I am retired.

I wish you consider me for the new position as a cashier. Thank you for the understanding and patience. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours Faithfully,

Krishnendu Mohan.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully covers all the bullet points required by the task prompt. You clearly state your experience in your current role, suggest how the company would benefit from your transfer to the cashier department, and explain your reasons for wanting to stay within the same company. The purpose of the letter is evident from the opening paragraph, and a consistent tone is maintained throughout. However, some ideas remain slightly under-developed; for instance, the explanation of what you have learned in your present job relies heavily on listing basic tasks rather than exploring broader professional growth. To reach the next level, you need to extend your ideas further, providing more elaborate explanations and fully supporting every point with greater depth and specific context.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear, logical structure that follows the conventions of formal correspondence. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points, such as your current role, the reasons for transfer, and your commitment to the company. Cohesive devices are employed to connect ideas, as seen when you use transitions like 'Furthermore' and 'First reason is that'. Nevertheless, referencing and cohesion can occasionally feel mechanical or repetitive, such as the frequent reliance on 'I wish' and basic conjunctions. To achieve a higher band, you should integrate a wider variety of cohesive devices more naturally and ensure that paragraph transitions flow seamlessly without relying on formulaic expressions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, successfully communicating your message, but it shows limited flexibility. You attempt some less common vocabulary, such as 'social butterfly' and 'counterfiet', but this is accompanied by noticeable spelling errors and awkward word choices, such as writing 'prouce' instead of 'produce' and 'checking counterfiet money' rather than 'detecting counterfeit currency'. Word form errors also appear, such as 'cashier department' instead of 'the cashier department'. To improve your lexical score, you need to use a wider range of precise vocabulary with accurate spelling, better collocations, and correct word forms, minimizing errors that occasionally distract the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an ability to combine clauses using connectors like 'because' and 'while'. You manage some good structural attempts, but grammar and punctuation errors persist throughout the text, including run-on sentences, missing articles, and awkward phrasing such as 'feelit it is significant' and 'these skills are would definitely benefit'. Additionally, preposition use and verb tense consistency need closer attention. While these errors rarely impede overall communication, they prevent the writing from reaching a higher band. To advance, you must increase the proportion of error-free sentences and exercise better control over complex grammatical structures and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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