Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I started a job two years ago in your company. I learnt web development & communication skills during my current job but I would like to move to a different sector in this firm which is vital for my career development. I initiated my journey from here and always wanted to being a part of it.

I want to start my career as a business development executive where the department will get more clients because my current expertise. I can easily uderstand the cause and will immediately provide the timeline to fix it that saves a lot of time without arranging a meeting.

I do not want to leave this organization because I have learned many skills uder the supervision of the manager. I have got many opportunities here to boost my confidence which made my professional career brighter. Also, I won many awards which brings happiness to my life.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,

Dhwani Thummar.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt, covering what you have learned in your present job, suggesting how the company would benefit from moving you, and explaining why you wish to stay within the organization. For instance, you mention gaining web development and communication skills over the past two years, and you clearly explain your desire to transition into a business development executive role to help secure more clients. However, some ideas remain slightly under-developed. Specifically, the explanation regarding how you will immediately provide a timeline to fix issues lacks complete clarity and extension. To move to a higher level, you should expand further on your arguments by providing concrete examples of how your current expertise would practically benefit the new department and the wider company.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

Your letter demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a logical flow from your current situation to your future career goals, and finally to your reasons for staying. Paragraphing is used adequately to separate distinct points, such as your past learning in the first paragraph, the departmental move in the second, and your loyalty to the firm in the third. Nevertheless, cohesion is at times a bit mechanical. For example, the transition between ideas in the second paragraph feels slightly abrupt, and referencing devices could be managed more smoothly to connect sentences together. To achieve a stronger level of cohesion, ensure that cohesive devices are used more flexibly and that relationships between sentences are signalled more naturally without relying on repetitive structural patterns.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common lexical items such as 'career development', 'web development', and 'professional career'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, word form, and spelling that occasionally disrupt the flow. For instance, phrases like 'wanted to being a part of it' contain a word-form error, and the misspelling 'uderstant' (understand) along with repetitive use of 'uder' indicate that your vocabulary control needs tightening. To reach a higher standard, you should incorporate a wider variety of precise vocabulary and collocations while carefully checking your spelling and word forms before finalizing your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

Your letter features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an ability to construct multi-clause sentences such as 'I learnt web development & communication skills during my current job but I would like to move...' There are, however, some errors in grammar, punctuation, and prepositions, such as 'in your company' versus 'from here', and occasional awkward phrasing like 'because my current expertise' where a preposition or conjunction is missing. These errors rarely impede overall communication, but they prevent the writing from achieving complete accuracy. To improve this criterion, focus on increasing your stock of error-free complex structures, pay closer attention to prepositional usage in complex patterns, and ensure strict control over verb tenses and agreement.

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