Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir,

I hope this letter finds you well. I am writting this letter to request you to transfer me to another different department for my career growth. As I am working with the company from last 2 year in the account department. I gain all knowledge of an accounting rules and systems to work with. Now, I feel very confident to solve any kind of customer queries.

I want to move in to HR department as I have completed my HRM course. I am working with the company from long time so I know the recruitment process and also I have experience of payroll system. This can be helpful to the department to working with experienced employee. It can save time and cost of the company.

As a part of company since last many years, it can be helpful to my career growth. I do not want to leave this organisation because I feel emotionally attached with the company. Moreover, This company given me a good collegues who stand by me in every situation. It has provide me a good support for my study and career that I could never forget. Now, I want to invest my all knowledge and skill to grow the company.

I am very thankful and delighted to work with recognizable company.

I am waiting for your positive response.

Yours faithfully,

Vidhi Patel

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three requested points and make your purpose clear: you seek a move to HR, describe what you have learned in accounts, and explain why you want to remain with the company. The details about your HRM course, recruitment knowledge and payroll experience also give a relevant reason for the proposed transfer. This meets the task well, with some elements already showing the development expected at a stronger level. However, the benefits to the company are asserted rather than fully explained: “It can save time and cost” would be more convincing if linked to a specific contribution you could make in HR. The reasons for staying are personal and relevant, but could be expressed more clearly and concisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a clear overall arrangement: you state your request, explain your suitability for HR, and then give reasons for staying with the organisation. Paragraphing helps the reader follow these main stages, and phrases such as “Moreover” and “As a part of company” attempt to connect ideas. At times, however, the links feel mechanical or the reference is unclear. For example, “As a part of company since last many years, it can be helpful to my career growth” does not clearly show what “it” refers to, and the sentence does not connect smoothly to your reason for staying. Use more precise links between each claim and its explanation, and ensure each paragraph develops one clear point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the workplace and the purpose of the letter, including “career growth,” “recruitment process,” “payroll system” and “emotionally attached.” These choices make your main meaning understandable and show some range beyond basic everyday language. However, several word choices, collocations and spelling errors make the expression less natural, such as “another different department,” “working with experienced employee,” “good collegues” and “recognizable company.” Some phrases are also vague, including “all knowledge” and “invest my all knowledge and skill.” Aim for more precise professional wording and check spelling and word forms. For example, describe the specific accounting procedures you have learned and the skills you could contribute to HR.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, and the reader can generally understand your request and supporting reasons. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in verb forms, tense, articles and sentence construction. For instance, “I am working with the company from last 2 year” needs a present-perfect form and a suitable time expression, while “This company given me” is missing an auxiliary verb. “As I am working with the company…” is also an incomplete sentence when separated from the preceding request. These errors do not usually prevent communication, but they reduce accuracy. Practise combining dependent clauses with complete main clauses, and check tense consistency and subject–verb agreement when revising.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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