Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir

I am writing you formally that as you know i am working for past two years in a admin office now I want to switch my department with sales office for better caree development growth.

I started my career with so much passion in this company and appointed as a admin officer. Since that i mastered all the admin related task like manage the calenders, write down the minutes and manage all the paperwork in order.

I believe that if the company transfer me in the sales branch i will also perform their quiet well, and its surely beneficial for the company sales growth.

Well I think lucky enough that i join this organization it give sufficient pay and benefit and the repution is recognized nation wide. At any cost i dont want to leave this company i want to work here for career development which eventually leads toward company growth.

I sincerely hope you will consider my request favorably at your earliest convenience.

Yours Faithfully

Suneel Iqbal

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three points and make your purpose clear: you want to move from administration to sales, believe you can contribute to sales growth, and wish to remain with the company because of its pay, benefits, and reputation. The examples of managing calendars, taking minutes, and handling paperwork make your current experience relevant. However, the benefit to the company is asserted rather than explained: “I will also perform their quite well” does not show how your administrative skills would help the sales team. Your reasons for staying are clearer, but could be linked more directly to your commitment and future contribution. Develop these ideas with one or two specific examples, and use a more polished, appropriately formal opening and closing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a coherent overall arrangement: you state your request, describe your current experience, explain the potential benefit of a transfer, and give reasons for staying. Paragraph breaks help distinguish these points, and the closing makes the requested action clear. Some connections are mechanical or unclear, however. “Since that” introduces your experience awkwardly, while “Well” does not create a suitably formal transition into your reasons for remaining. The relationship between your administrative skills and the sales department’s needs is also not made explicit. Use clearer linking phrases and make each paragraph develop one point in a logical sequence; for example, connect your knowledge of company procedures to a specific way you could support sales staff.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough task-related vocabulary to communicate the main message, including “admin officer,” “minutes,” “paperwork,” “sales growth,” and “career development.” There are also attempts at more formal expressions, such as “consider my request favorably.” However, several word choices, collocations, and spelling errors reduce precision and naturalness: “switch my department,” “perform their quite well,” “sufficient pay and benefit,” and “repution is recognized nation wide.” Some terms are also repeated, particularly “company” and “growth.” Choose more natural workplace phrases and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would help explain what you can contribute in sales, rather than relying on the general claim that you would perform well.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You communicate through a mix of simple sentences and some longer structures, including “I believe that if the company transfer me … I will also perform…” and the final clause beginning “which eventually leads…”. The main message remains understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in basic sentence patterns and longer sentences. For example, “I am working for past two years” needs a suitable present-perfect form and preposition, and “Since that i mastered” has an incorrect time expression and verb form. In “it give sufficient pay and benefit,” the subject and verb do not agree, and the sentence needs clearer punctuation. Practise accurate tense choices, articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, then proofread capitalization and punctuation.

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