Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Mr. Smith,

I am writing this letter to express my desire to switch department within the company for better progression of my career.

As you know, I am working as an IT support Enginner in Data Communication department of the company. My six-months at this role have been very productive as I have learned technical knowledge and developed interpersonal skills. I involved myself more with customers while assisting them with their issues to provide them support according to Standard Operation procedures. I also gained a valuable knowledge of company portals such as ServiceNow and PRTG monitor.

Given that now I have gained enough experience in the technical team, I would like to switch towards the management side of the organisation. As I have previous experience of working as an IT manager, I believe I can contribute positively in managing IT-related contracts and tasks.

Having said that, I do not wish to leave the company but only want an internal switch. I have the adequate knowledge of comapnay's goals and ambitions and I highly appreciate the work culture implemented by the organisation.

I hope you will give my request careful consideration. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours sincerely,

Fazal

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three points and make your purpose clear from the opening: you want to move internally to support your career development. You describe learning technical knowledge, customer support procedures, and company systems, and you explain that your prior management experience could help with contracts and tasks. Your reason for staying—familiarity with the company and appreciation of its work culture—is also relevant. However, some points are less fully developed than others: the benefits of transferring you are asserted rather than illustrated with a specific contribution, and your learning in the current role could be linked more clearly to the new department. Add a concrete example of how your skills would help that team.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter is organised in a clear sequence: purpose, experience gained, proposed transfer, reason for staying, and a polite closing. Paragraphing supports this progression, and phrases such as “Given that” and “Having said that” help signal shifts between ideas. The overall arrangement is coherent and easy to follow. To make the cohesion more flexible and natural, avoid relying on explicit transition phrases where the relationship is already clear, and connect the evidence more directly to your request. For example, explain how your customer-support experience prepares you to manage IT contracts. The opening and closing are appropriate, though a more specific request for a meeting or discussion would give the letter a stronger final progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of work-related vocabulary, including “interpersonal skills,” “Standard Operation procedures,” “IT-related contracts,” and “work culture.” These choices make the purpose and professional context clear, and you attempt some less common expressions. However, several word-choice, collocation, and spelling issues reduce precision: “switch department” is less natural than “transfer to another department,” “a valuable knowledge” is not idiomatic, and “comapnay's” and “Enginner” are misspelled. “Management side” is understandable but somewhat vague. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and proofread spelling; more precise terms for the target department and the contribution you could make would strengthen the professional tone.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and most sentences communicate the intended meaning clearly. The conditional structure in “I believe I can contribute positively…” and the subordinate clause beginning “Given that…” show some range. There are some grammatical errors, but they rarely impede understanding. For example, “I am working as an IT support…” would be more naturally expressed with the present simple for an ongoing job, while “I involved myself more with customers” has an awkward verb pattern. The phrase “My six-months at this role” also has a number and article problem. Review tense choice, countable and uncountable nouns, and verb patterns, while retaining the longer sentence structures you already attempt.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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