Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir,

I am writing to request my transfer to a different department in our company Sigma Healthcare. I kindly seek your approval for the same.

I am Aman Dharni, working as a software engineer from the last two years in the IT department of your organisation. I have acquired huge knowledge in information technology field and became quite frequent to deal with different codes and programs. I learned to work under pressure and developed great communication skills.

I am sure department change will not only benefit me but also it will contribute to the company as a whole. I am quite keen to work in the sales or the accounts department for growing more and learning new skills. I can help my co-workers to develop their problem-solving skills which I have gained by working in my present role.

I do not think that leaving this company is practical for a consistent person like me . I believe in long-term commitment with a vision to learn new things simultaneously. I look forward for a favourable response from your side.

Yours faithfully,

Aman Dharni.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three required points and make your purpose clear: you request a transfer, describe skills gained in IT, and explain that you want to remain with the company. The examples of working under pressure and developing communication and problem-solving skills are relevant. However, the benefit to the company is less fully explained: helping colleagues develop problem-solving skills is useful, but you could show more specifically how your IT experience would contribute to sales or accounts. Your reason for staying—long-term commitment and continued learning—is also stated rather generally. Develop these points with a concrete example, and maintain a suitably professional tone throughout, to make the response more complete and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a clear overall structure: the opening states the request, the following paragraphs cover your experience and the potential benefits, and the final paragraph explains why you wish to stay. This makes the main message easy to follow. Connections between ideas are generally understandable, with phrases such as “not only… but also” helping to link the benefits. Some transitions and references are less natural or precise, however; for example, “for the same” and “from your side” do not smoothly connect the ideas in a professional letter. The final paragraph also moves quickly from your commitment to the request for a response. Use more natural linking expressions and make the relationship between each reason and your request explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of workplace vocabulary, including “department,” “information technology,” “communication skills,” and “long-term commitment,” so the reader can understand your experience and aims. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, but several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “acquired huge knowledge,” “became quite frequent to deal with,” and “look forward for a favourable response.” These choices reduce precision and make parts of the letter sound less fluent. Aim for common, accurate collocations—for example, “gained considerable knowledge,” “became accustomed to working with,” and “look forward to hearing from you.” More precise language about the contribution you could make in sales or accounts would also strengthen the response.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, and most of your meaning remains clear. The sentence “I am sure department change will not only benefit me but also it will contribute to the company as a whole” shows an attempt to express a linked, balanced idea. Some grammatical errors remain, including “working… from the last two years,” where the time expression and tense pattern are not accurate, and “I look forward for,” where the preposition is incorrect. There are also punctuation and spacing slips, such as the space before the full stop in “like me .” Review present-perfect forms for continuing situations, articles in noun phrases, and punctuation. Greater accuracy in these areas would make the letter more polished.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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