Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Mr. Sharma,

I am writing to kindly request you to change my department. I would like to explain the situation and ask for your assistance regarding this matter.

I work in the account department. I have learned about teamwork, decision making and leader ship. This skills help me a lot in my day to day work.

If company will give me a transfer into different department. I would be grateful to work with all my skills and give my best in other sectors as well.

There are many reason why I do not wish to leave the company such as friendly environment, various health and transport benefits.

I would appreciate it if you could transfer me in to different department , it can helps me in my career growth.

Thank you for taking the time to consider my request. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours faithfully

Preet

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address the three requested points: you mention learning teamwork, decision-making and leadership, give possible benefits of transferring your skills, and explain that you value the company’s environment and benefits. The purpose of the letter is clear, but the reasons are brief and not fully developed. For example, you do not identify a particular department or explain how your experience in accounts would help that team or benefit the company. The reason for staying is also listed rather than explained. To strengthen the response, add specific examples of what you learned and connect those skills to a contribution you could make in another department.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The letter has a recognisable structure, with an opening request, paragraphs covering your experience and reasons, and a polite closing. This makes the main message understandable. However, progression between ideas is sometimes abrupt: the transfer request is repeated in the opening and near the end, while the benefits to the company are not clearly separated from your personal career goal. Some linking is also awkward, as in “If company will give me a transfer…” followed by “I would be grateful.” Organise the body around the three task points, and use clear links to show how your experience leads to a benefit for the company and why you wish to remain there.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough relevant vocabulary to communicate the basic purpose, including “teamwork,” “decision making,” “career growth,” and “health and transport benefits.” However, the range is limited, and several word choices or collocations sound unnatural, such as “change my department,” “transfer me in to different department,” and “other sectors.” Spelling and word formation also need attention: “leader ship” should be “leadership,” and “day to day” is usually written “day-to-day” when used as an adjective. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding your request, but more precise workplace vocabulary would make the letter more professional. Practise standard phrases for requesting an internal transfer and describing relevant skills.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You communicate the main ideas using mostly short, simple sentences, and the letter includes an attempt at a conditional structure. However, the range is limited, and errors occur in sentence formation, verb forms, agreement, articles and prepositions. For example, “If company will give me a transfer” needs a conditional form such as “If the company transfers me,” while “This skills help me” should be “These skills help me.” In “it can helps me,” the modal should be followed by the base verb: “it can help me.” There are also punctuation and spacing slips, including the space before the comma in “department ,”. Review these patterns and combine ideas into accurate complex sentences.

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