Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-15
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter
- say what you have learned in your present job
- suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
- explain why you do not wish to leave the company
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Dear Mr John,
I am writing to inform you about my wish to change the department within the company.
I started working with the company two years ago as a personal assistant. Because of my current position, I developed the ability the handle responsibility and take informed decisions in the right time. I perform a wide range of tasks and coordinate with different departments which enabled me to build trust with the company's employees and other companies.
However, I would recommend that you accept to move me to the marketing department. I feel that working there would be benefitial for the company since I gained a valuable experience in my position. I would absolutly share my knowledge, and increase team work spirit which will eventually improve productivity and confidence between the staff member.
I want to ensure that I do not intend to resign. Working in the company is convenient hence developing my creer and boost my abilties could be realised if you moved me to the marketing department.
Looking forward to receive your answer.
Yours sincerely
Sabri
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You address all three requested points: you describe skills gained as a personal assistant, propose a move to marketing, and explain that you want to remain with the company. The reasons are relevant, especially your experience coordinating with other departments and your wish to develop your career internally. However, the benefit to the company is less fully explained: claims about improving “productivity and confidence” are broad, and you could show more specifically how your existing coordination skills would support marketing work. The reason for staying is also brief and focuses mainly on convenience and career development. Developing these points with concrete examples would make the letter more complete and persuasive.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The letter has a clear overall structure: an opening request, a paragraph about your current role, a proposal for marketing, and a closing explanation. The sequence is easy to follow, and transitions such as “However” and “since” help connect ideas. Some links are less effective or slightly mechanical, though. “However” suggests a contrast that is not fully clear, while “hence” in the final paragraph makes the relationship between staying and developing your career awkward. The long sentence about coordinating with departments also combines several ideas without clearly showing their relationship. Use more precise transitions and divide or reshape sentences where needed to make the progression smoother.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a suitable range of workplace vocabulary, including “personal assistant,” “coordinate,” “valuable experience,” and “productivity,” so the message is clear and relevant. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, but some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “accept to move me,” “confidence between the staff member,” and “convenient” to explain why you want to stay. Spelling errors in “benefitial,” “absolutly,” “creer,” and “abilties” also reduce accuracy. Aim for natural professional expressions and check spelling carefully; this would make your vocabulary more precise and polished.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
You use both straightforward sentences and more complex forms, including “Because of my current position…” and “which will eventually improve…”. Most of the message remains understandable, and errors rarely obscure your meaning. Some grammatical problems are noticeable, however. In “the ability the handle responsibility,” the infinitive marker should be “to”; “in the right time” needs a different article and preposition; and “Looking forward to receive your answer” requires a gerund after “to.” There are also issues with sentence construction in “hence developing my career and boost my abilities could be realised.” Practise accurate infinitive and gerund patterns, and revise complex sentences for clear structure.
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