Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter
- say what you have learned in your present job
- suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
- explain why you do not wish to leave the company
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 5.0)
dear Manager,
My name is John, and I am working in your company from last 2 years as a pre-loader.I am writing this letter with regards to move to a different department in our company.
As you know i am working at MF3, PD1 and PD2 departments and I performed well their in scanning, loading and unloading in our company. you can check my PPH it is also recorded at peak so you give me recognisition certificates for my hard work.
I recommendyou to promote me as a supervisor in management department. With my creativity and experience i can surve you well. Your assistant narsi was teaching me everything when i start which will be benifited for your department too.
Company Benifits and free health insaurance push me to stay here so i wish to change my department instead of changing company.A quick action from your side will be appreciated.
yours sincerely,
John
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You make a relevant request to move departments and include all three required points: you mention learning scanning, loading and unloading, explain that your experience could help in a supervisor role, and say that company benefits and health insurance are reasons to stay. However, the points are only partly developed. For example, you do not explain clearly what specific skills you gained or how these would benefit the management department, and the reason for staying focuses mainly on benefits rather than your commitment to the company. The request is also somewhat unclear: “promote me as a supervisor” may not mean the same as moving departments. Add a clearer explanation of your career goal and the value you would bring to the new team.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The letter follows a recognisable order: you introduce your request, describe your current work, propose a new role, and explain why you want to remain with the company. This gives the reader a basic structure. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow, particularly where several ideas are joined together: “you can check my PPH… so you give me recognisition certificates” does not clearly show how the points connect. Paragraphing is present, but the final paragraph combines the reason for staying with the request for quick action. Use clearer transitions and separate the benefits you offer from your reasons for remaining, so each paragraph has one main purpose.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You use some relevant workplace vocabulary, including “department,” “supervisor,” “management,” “scanning,” and “experience,” which helps communicate the subject of the letter. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the message less clear. For instance, “surve you well” does not express your intended contribution, while “promote me as a supervisor” is not the clearest way to request a transfer. There are also noticeable spelling errors, such as “recognisition,” “benifited,” and “insaurance.” Choose precise professional phrases and check spelling carefully; this will make your request sound more natural and easier for your manager to understand.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You communicate the main message using mostly simple sentence patterns, and you attempt some longer structures, such as “With my creativity and experience…” and the sentence about your assistant teaching you. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to make parts of the letter awkward or unclear. Examples include “I am working in your company from last 2 years,” where the tense and time expression need correction, and “when i start,” which should use a past form. Sentence boundaries and punctuation also need attention: “department in our company. As you know i am…” should be followed by a capital letter, and several sentences run ideas together. Practise accurate past and present-perfect forms and build longer sentences with clear clauses.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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