Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear sir,

I am writing to express my interest in transferring to different department a within in a company to futher develop my professional skills and career.

I have been working in my current position for the past two years ,during which i have gained valuable experience and learned new things new department help me develop my knowledge skills In particular,I have improved my communication skills teamwork manager post and time management skills. I have also learned how to customers my professionally and complete tasks efficiently.

I believe that moving to another department the company would benefit as well as my future career. I would able to apply another department knowledge skills and experience. I deserve to work another department because i know i understand of manager post and i have knowledge and experience.

Although, i am interested to exploring new opportunities. I do not wish to leave the company .I appreciate to the support manager team .

Your faithfully

Anita

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address the main purpose by requesting a transfer and mentioning what you have learned, how the company could benefit, and why you want to stay. The examples of communication, teamwork and time management give some relevant detail. However, the reasons are not always clear or fully developed: “I would able to apply another department knowledge skills and experience” does not explain specifically how this would help the company, and “I appreciate to the support manager team” does not clearly explain why you wish to remain. Develop each point with a concrete example, and state your request and reasons more directly. The letter is relevant overall, but some ideas remain limited or unclear.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic letter structure, with separate paragraphs for your experience, the proposed move and your wish to stay. This gives the reader some sense of the topics being covered. However, progression within paragraphs is difficult to follow, especially in the long second paragraph, where several ideas run together: “learned new things new department help me develop my knowledge skills” is not clearly connected. Linking words are limited, and “Although” introduces a contrast without a complete contrasting idea. Use one clear purpose per paragraph, separate related points into sentences, and connect them with accurate transitions such as “In addition” or “For this reason.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant workplace vocabulary, including “professional skills,” “communication skills,” “teamwork” and “time management.” These terms show an attempt to discuss career development and your contribution. However, the range is limited and several phrases are inaccurate or unclear, such as “how to customers my professionally,” “manager post” and “another department knowledge skills.” Spelling and word-form errors, including “futher,” also reduce precision. Choose familiar expressions that fit the meaning, such as “deal with customers professionally” and “experience in my current role,” and check spelling. More precise vocabulary would make your reasons easier for the manager to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to express reasons and contrast, for example with “Although” and “during which,” but most sentences rely on simple structures, and attempts at longer sentences are often faulty. Errors in sentence boundaries and punctuation make some meaning difficult to follow: “I have gained valuable experience and learned new things new department help me develop…” contains several ideas without a clear grammatical connection. There are also missing or incorrect articles and verb forms, as in “I would able to apply” and “I am interested to exploring.” Practise complete sentence patterns, including “I would be able to…” and “I am interested in exploring…,” and use full stops to separate ideas.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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