Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Dear jems

i want to inform you about my job

my name is amandeep kaur

and i am doing job in your compam

ny as casior last two years.

i got lot of knowledge from the campany and others,

i did work honesty and hardwork. but now i want to change place because same company has my near home and i want to transfer that place.

it will be vert hard for me because i have best colleuge who are ready for helping others.

i have some sweet memories as well as celebrated special occasios

i have got experience from your department which will be very helpful for my futur.I hope you will understand my condition and grant me permission.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You make a relevant request to move, and mention your two years as a cashier, the knowledge and experience gained, and your wish to remain with the company. However, the response does not clearly address two key points: it gives little detail about what you learned, and it does not explain how the company would benefit from transferring you. The reason for the move is also unclear: “same company has my near home” seems to mean that another location is closer to home, but this needs to be stated directly. The letter contains 120 words, so it is 30 words below the required minimum. Develop each bullet point with specific details, especially the benefit to the company, and make the request explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

The ideas are broadly related to the purpose of the letter, moving from your current role to your request and then to positive memories of the company. However, the response is presented as a sequence of short, mostly unconnected lines, with no clear paragraphing or formal closing. The transition from wanting to change place to describing colleagues and memories is not clearly explained, so the reader may not understand how these points support your request. Basic links such as “but” and “because” are attempted, but the relationships between ideas are sometimes unclear. Group the letter into paragraphs—for example, your experience, the proposed transfer and its benefits, and your reasons for staying—and use clear linking phrases to show how each point connects.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some vocabulary relevant to employment and the task, including “department,” “experience,” “colleagues,” and “permission,” and the reader can generally identify your main purpose. However, the range is limited and several spelling errors or imprecise expressions make the letter less clear, such as “compamny,” “casior,” and “same company has my near home.” Some phrases are also unnatural for a formal request, including “doing job” and “change place.” Choose precise workplace expressions and check spelling carefully. For example, you could say “I have worked as a cashier” and “I would like to transfer to the branch closer to my home.” This would make your meaning clearer and give the letter a more appropriate professional tone.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to communicate several connected ideas, including a reason for requesting a transfer, and use simple clauses that are generally understandable. However, sentence structures are mostly basic, and errors in sentence formation and punctuation sometimes make the relationships between ideas difficult to follow. For example, “i am doing job in your compam ny as casior last two years” lacks a clear, correctly formed verb phrase and time expression. The opening lines also need sentence capitals and full stops, while “i want to change place because same company has my near home” does not form a clear grammatical explanation. Practise complete sentences with accurate tense and articles, such as “I have worked as a cashier for the past two years.”

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