Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Mr. Smith,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing to express my interest in moving to a new department after working for two years in the current department.

When I started this job, I was thrilled and with the passage of time I developed numerous skills such as leadership, organizational and managerial. I could see a difference in my abilities from when I was just new to this working environment. By working in the project handling department I have become a different person.

Given my abilities, I strongly feel that I would love to move to a new departement especially to the Data centre department. As you my know, managerial and data handeling skills are require in this department, and there are some new employees are working. If I move to that area, I believe I would be able to handle better in any negative circumstances.

In your organization, I started working right after completing my studies, I was fortunate to receive employement opportunity here and have become better in my capabilities. Hence, I would love to stay employed in this company as long as I could and learn something new each time.

Thank you for your time and considration.

Yours faithfully,

Muskan

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The letter addresses all three requested points and maintains a clear, appropriate purpose: you describe skills gained, propose a move to the Data Centre, and explain your wish to remain with the company. The strongest coverage is your reason for staying, supported by the fact that you joined after your studies and have developed there. The benefits to the company are less fully explained: saying you could “handle better in any negative circumstances” is vague, and the reference to new employees does not show specifically how your experience would help the department. Develop this point with a concrete contribution, such as training colleagues or improving project coordination. Overall, the relevant ideas are clear, though some are less developed than others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall structure, with separate paragraphs for your experience, the proposed transfer, and your reasons for staying. The opening and closing also suit a formal workplace letter, and phrases such as “Given my abilities” and “Hence” help signal relationships between ideas. This coherent arrangement meets the main expectations at this level. However, some links are not fully clear: “By working in the project handling department I have become a different person” does not specify which abilities or experience are relevant to the transfer, and “As you my know” interrupts the flow. Make the progression more explicit by connecting each skill learned to a specific benefit in the Data Centre, and use linking phrases accurately and sparingly.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of vocabulary for a formal request, including “express my interest,” “organizational,” “managerial,” and “capabilities.” These choices communicate the main ideas, and some attempts at more specific workplace language are evident. However, several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems reduce precision: “project handling department,” “data handeling skills,” and “handle better in any negative circumstances” are awkward or unclear. There are also spelling errors such as “departement,” “employement,” and “considration.” Choose established workplace expressions and proofread carefully; for example, describe the skills you gained as “project coordination” or “data management,” and explain how they could support the new team. This would make your vocabulary more accurate and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The letter includes both simple and more developed sentence forms, such as “I am writing to express my interest in moving…” and “Hence, I would love to stay employed in this company as long as I could and learn something new each time.” Most sentences remain understandable, and the overall message is not obscured. Some grammatical errors nevertheless affect accuracy. In “As you my know,” the word order is incorrect; “managerial and data handeling skills are require” has an incorrect verb form; and “there are some new employees are working” contains a faulty clause structure. The phrase “I was thrilled and with the passage of time I developed…” also needs clearer coordination and punctuation. Review subject–verb agreement and clause construction, and separate linked ideas with appropriate punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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