Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this to let you know I joined this company two years ago. Now I feel it is necessary to move to other department for my personal career growth in the same company.

Furthermore, I had learnt a lot in this department and enhance my problem-solving skills. I have experienced the more reponsiblities and accountability of doing tasks. Additionally , I gained the team handling qualities in this team and collaboration with colleagues.

Moreover, I believe that if I get moved to different department I will be able to acquire some new competencies to grow in career. I think after learning cross skills I can contribute to multiple departments at the same time and also can train new joiners.

I do not wish to leave the company as it is a great place to work and flexible atmosphere, which I loved it most.

I would appreciate if you can consider my learning aspiration to move to other team. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours faithfully,

Pankaj Dubey

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three required points and maintain a clear, appropriate purpose: you describe skills gained, explain how cross-department experience could help the company, and give a reason for staying. The examples of problem-solving, accountability, teamwork and training new joiners make the request relevant. However, the benefits to the company are not fully explained: “contribute to multiple departments” and “train new joiners” are promising ideas, but you could show more specifically how your current experience would support the new team. The reason for remaining is also quite general (“a great place to work and flexible atmosphere”). Developing these points with concrete details would make the letter more complete and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall sequence: you introduce your request, describe what you have learned, explain the potential benefit of a transfer, and close politely. Paragraphing helps distinguish these stages, and linking expressions such as “Additionally” and “Moreover” make the relationships between ideas understandable. At times, however, the connectors feel mechanical or repetitive, and the opening paragraph could move more directly from your two years of service to the request. The transition from your proposed contribution to your reason for staying is also abrupt. Use a wider range of natural links and make the connection between each paragraph’s purpose clearer to create smoother progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant workplace vocabulary, including “problem-solving skills,” “accountability,” “collaboration,” “competencies” and “career growth,” so the reader can understand your professional aims. There are also attempts at less common expressions, but several choices or forms are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “team handling qualities,” “cross skills,” and “learning aspiration.” The spelling error in “reponsiblities” and the awkward phrase “flexible atmosphere” also reduce precision. Aim for natural collocations used in professional correspondence, such as “team-management skills,” “transferable skills,” and “professional development goals.” More accurate word choice and spelling would make your vocabulary more effective and polished.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “if I get moved to different department I will be able to acquire…” and a relative clause in “which I loved it most.” The main message remains clear, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, the conditional needs an article (“a different department”), and “which I loved it most” has an unnecessary object pronoun; write “which I liked most.” In “I had learnt a lot … and enhance my problem-solving skills,” the verb forms are not parallel. There are also missing articles and awkward sentence construction in the closing request. Check articles, verb consistency, and clause structure, then proofread punctuation and spacing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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