Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Mario,

I am writing this letter to ask for a rotation of my position to the other department particularly in Operation at our organization. As I am working with my current position from last two years, I would like to get some exposure to the other department.

I feel confident that this change will not only helps me to gain experience but it will also provides me chance to show my qualifications. As we know Operation department do not have any employee who has certification in Diploma, which I do have so it will be benefitted to them.

The reason why I would like to do rotation is that I do not want to switch to the other company as I am working with this company from a long time. Apart from that, I have many colleagues which are like family friends to me and I do not want to upsate them.

I am Hoping for favourable response from you regarding my application.

Kind regards,

Jay Bie

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The letter makes the central request clear: you want a move to the Operations department, and you explain that you have worked in your current role for two years. You also give a reason for staying with the company, mentioning your long-standing connection and colleagues. However, the task’s first point—what you have learned in your present job—is not really answered; asking for “some exposure” to another department does not describe skills or knowledge already gained. The benefit to the company is addressed through your Diploma certification, but the claim that the department has no certified employee needs clearer explanation of how your qualification would help its work. Develop these points and state your request more precisely to cover the task more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a clear overall arrangement: it opens with the request, gives a reason the transfer could benefit the company, explains why you want to remain, and closes politely. Paragraphing helps the reader follow these stages, and links such as “Apart from that” and “As we know” signal relationships between ideas. Some connections are less clear or mechanical, however. For example, “The reason why I would like to do rotation” introduces your wish to stay, rather than explaining the reason for a rotation, so the paragraph’s focus becomes confusing. The link between your Diploma and the department’s benefit also needs fuller explanation. Use more precise topic sentences and connect each supporting detail directly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of vocabulary for a workplace letter, including “rotation,” “exposure,” “qualifications,” and “favourable response.” These choices communicate the general purpose, but several phrases are inaccurate or unnatural and reduce precision: “a rotation of my position to the other department,” “it will be benefitted to them,” and “switch to the other company.” There is also a spelling error in “upsate,” and “Operation department” should be expressed as the department’s proper name consistently. Aim for natural workplace collocations and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise language would make your request sound professional and clarify exactly what contribution you could make in the new department.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including “As I am working with my current position…” and “I feel confident that this change…,” and the main message is generally understandable. However, some errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and prepositions remain. For example, “will not only helps” and “will also provides” should use the base verb after “will”; “Operation department do not have” has a subject–verb agreement problem; and “from last two years” and “from a long time” use unsuitable tense/preposition patterns. Capitalisation is also inconsistent in “I am Hoping.” Review these patterns and use a mix of accurate sentence structures so that the letter reads more smoothly and professionally.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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