Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir,

I am writing to express my enthusiasm to switch my sales coordinator position to the buyer. Over the past two years, I have gained valuable experience of using microsoft tools and enhanced my communication skills by coordinating with the sles team of other companies.

I believe the requirements for the buyer position are pretty much similiar with an exception of selling knowledge. However, my problem-solving and quick decision-making skills with a knowledge of using microsoft applications will be an asset to caught the things rapidly. Also, I can quickly learn the new things with a challenging approach.

My primary reason to be a part of this company is that the growth opportunities are excellent here and the working environment is quite respectful and calm. Moreover, the health benefits and perks are awesome with a 5 weeks of paid to spend a wonderful time with the loved-ones.

Looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours sincerely

Chirag Kumar Mair

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address the main purpose and all three bullet points: you request a move to the buyer role, refer to skills gained in your current job, and explain why you want to remain with the company. The reasons for staying—growth opportunities, a respectful environment and benefits—are relevant. However, the learning point is somewhat general: “using Microsoft tools” and improving communication through coordination are mentioned, but examples of responsibilities or achievements would make this more convincing. The benefit to the company is also less fully explained; you describe your ability to learn quickly, but do not clearly show how your experience would help the buying department or the company. Develop these points and make the request more explicit and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall arrangement: it opens with the request, then discusses your suitability, gives reasons for staying, and closes politely. Paragraphing helps the reader follow these stages, and linking expressions such as “However,” “Also,” and “Moreover” show the relationships between ideas. This already gives the response a coherent progression. To make the organisation more polished, ensure each paragraph has a distinct focus and connect the claimed skills directly to the company’s benefit. The transition from your qualifications to “My primary reason to be a part of this company” is understandable but somewhat abrupt. A more specific link, such as explaining how your company knowledge would support a smooth transition, would make cohesion feel less formulaic and strengthen the progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of relevant vocabulary, including “problem-solving,” “quick decision-making,” “growth opportunities,” and “working environment,” which helps communicate your reasons and skills. There are also attempts at more specific workplace language, such as “sales coordinator” and “buyer.” However, several word-choice, collocation and spelling problems reduce precision: “switch my … position to the buyer” is awkward, “caught the things rapidly” does not express learning effectively, and “a 5 weeks of paid” is unclear. “Similiar” and “sles” are spelling errors, while “awesome” is too informal for a letter to a manager. Choose conventional professional phrases and check spelling and collocations to make your meaning more natural and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple sentences and more developed structures, including the contrast introduced by “However” and the reason clause beginning “by coordinating.” Most of the message remains understandable, and the paragraphs contain complete ideas. Some grammatical errors nevertheless affect accuracy. For example, “with a knowledge of using” has an awkward article and construction, while “with a 5 weeks of paid” has an incorrect article and number pattern. In “I am writing to express my enthusiasm to switch my … position,” the verb pattern is not natural for this meaning; use a construction such as “enthusiasm for moving from … to …”. Review articles, prepositions and verb patterns, and punctuate the closing consistently. More accurate control of these forms would make the letter smoother.

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