Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Hi Dear,

General Manager

Jersey Mike's Restaurant

Respected Sir,

Hello sir am currently working as a shift manager in this restaurant from 2 years and I learned so many thing and skills at this position that how to handle busy restaurant lunch timings and dinner timings. I really liked to working here and super happy as a working staff here gaining experience and giving training to new employees. Now I want to write down a request to you for my and for our company as well that I wanna move to a different position in Health Management or Hiring staff. As you know me how fast I learned new tasks and everything so am requesting you to that please refer me to that department so I can do more for our company and I dont want to leave this company as I feel home here and together we did alot.

Thankyou,

Yours Kalpana

Obedient and Responsible Employee

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address the main purpose by requesting a move within the company and explaining that you value staying there. You also mention relevant learning from your current role, such as handling busy lunch and dinner periods and training new employees. However, the benefit to the company is only briefly suggested through “I can do more for our company”; explain more specifically how your restaurant experience would help in Health Management or hiring. The reason for staying—“I feel home here”—is clear but could be developed with a more professional detail, such as your commitment to the team or familiarity with the company. The request is understandable, though a clearer, consistently professional position and fuller support for each point would strengthen the letter.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The letter includes the requested topics, and the reader can follow the broad sequence from your experience to your request and your wish to remain with the company. However, most of the content is placed in one long paragraph, so the separate points are not clearly organised. The opening also has several competing forms of address—“Hi Dear,” “General Manager,” and “Respected Sir”—which interrupts the flow and does not follow the requested simple salutation. Linking phrases such as “As you know” and “so” connect ideas, but the progression becomes crowded in the long sentence beginning “Now I want to write down a request.” Use short paragraphs for experience, the proposed transfer and its benefits, and your reason for staying.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough job-related vocabulary to communicate the basic situation, including “shift manager,” “training,” “employees,” and “different position.” However, the range is limited and several expressions are informal or imprecise for a letter to a manager, such as “wanna,” “so many thing,” and “do more for our company.” Some phrases are awkwardly chosen, including “busy restaurant lunch timings” and “working staff,” which make parts of the message less natural. Aim for precise workplace language and appropriate formality: describe the skills you have developed, name the department or role you are seeking, and state the practical contribution you could make. This would make your meaning clearer and more professional.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response communicates its main message, but it relies heavily on long, joined sentences and shows frequent errors in basic sentence construction. For example, “Hello sir am currently working” lacks clear punctuation and a subject structure, while “I really liked to working here” uses an incorrect verb pattern. There are also problems with tense and agreement in “from 2 years” and “so many thing,” and the request sentence beginning “I wanna move” becomes difficult to follow because several clauses are joined together. Use complete sentences with clear subjects and verbs, and separate ideas with full stops. Practising present perfect forms for experience and infinitive patterns such as “I would like to move” will improve accuracy.

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