Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing to request you for the shift of my post from the composing department to the managment department of the company. It is important for my career. I have learnt a lot here in previous two years. Moreover, I have gained a lot of skills in editing, composing, and designing presentations.

Additionally, I am interested in getting the skills regarding managment. Before joining your company i was doing similar job in another company. Consequently, I have gained enough knowledge about it. I will become expert in a very little period of the time if I get this opportunity.

Furthermore, I want to work with your company in future and I do not want to leave it. Because I have gained a lot here regarding experience, finance, and moral support form high-ups and colleagues. The work time and rules and regluations are also very good here.

I hope you will consider my request and will do something in this regard.

Yours sincerely,

X.Y.Z.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The letter addresses all three required points and maintains a clear, appropriate purpose: you request a move, describe skills gained in your current role, and explain why you want to remain with the company. The examples of “editing, composing, and designing presentations” make your learning relevant, while your experience and support from colleagues help explain your loyalty. The benefit to the company is present but less fully developed: saying you could become an expert quickly does not clearly show what the department or company would gain. To strengthen this, explain how your existing skills and previous experience could help the management team, for example by improving coordination or supporting projects. The next step is to extend this benefit with a specific, convincing detail.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The message has a coherent overall arrangement: it opens with the request, moves to your experience and interest in management, and ends with your reasons for staying and a polite closing. Paragraph breaks help distinguish these points, and connectors such as “Moreover,” “Additionally,” and “Furthermore” make the sequence easy to follow. However, the linking is somewhat mechanical, with several paragraphs beginning in a similar way, and the relationship between your prior experience and the company’s benefit could be made clearer. The sentence beginning “Because I have gained…” is also attached awkwardly to the preceding idea. Use a wider range of natural transitions and connect each reason directly to the request to make progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including relevant terms such as “career,” “skills,” “editing,” and “moral support.” There are also attempts at more specific workplace language, but some choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “request you for the shift of my post,” “skills regarding management,” and “in a very little period of the time.” Spelling errors in “managment,” “regluations,” and “form” are noticeable and reduce the overall precision. Aim to learn common professional collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise wording for the transfer request and the value you could bring to the new department would make the letter sound more fluent and appropriately formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The letter includes a mix of simple sentences and some attempts at more complex structures, and the main message remains understandable. Several sentences are grammatically controlled, such as “I am writing to request…” and “I have gained a lot here…”. However, some errors affect accuracy: “I am writing to request you for…” has an incorrect grammatical pattern, and “Because I have gained…” is a sentence fragment. There are also issues with capitalization and punctuation, including the lowercase “i” after a full stop and inconsistent spacing. Practise forming requests with patterns such as “request a transfer” or “ask you to consider,” and review how to join subordinate clauses to complete sentences. This will improve control while retaining sentence variety.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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