Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Mr. Anuar,

I am writing this letter to tell you that I want to move to a different department of your company.

I have been a video editor for 2 years and I have learned so much in this company, and this company is really important to me because it gives me a chance to show and express myself through editing videos, however I want to continue my career in the different department of your company. I want to be in the IT Department because I want to be a frontend programmer of your website.

I graduated as a Informational Technology student and it align for me to be in the IT Department. I am very good at designing a website and I can show you all my work to prove to you that I am capable of handling and designing the companies website.

I hope you give me a chance to prove to you that I am capable to be more than just a video editor.

Sincerely yours,

Abdul Azis M. Macasipot

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You clearly request a move to the IT Department and explain that you have worked as a video editor for two years and studied Information Technology. These details address your career goal and give the manager some reason to consider your application. However, the task’s three points are not covered equally: what you learned in your current job is only stated generally as having “learned so much,” and the benefit to the company is not clearly explained beyond your ability to design its website. You also say the company is important to you, but do not fully explain why you want to remain there rather than seek a similar role elsewhere. Develop these points with specific skills gained and a clear benefit to the company.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The letter follows a recognisable sequence: you state your request, give background about your current role and IT studies, and close by asking for an opportunity. The paragraphs also separate the main stages of your message. However, the progression within the second paragraph is crowded: it combines what you value about the company, your wish to change departments, and your preferred role in one long sentence. The repeated use of “company” and “I want” makes the links feel somewhat mechanical. Give each task point its own clear paragraph and use more precise references, such as “the organisation” or “this experience,” so the reader can follow your reasoning more smoothly.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main purpose, with relevant terms such as “video editor,” “frontend programmer,” and “designing a website.” You also use phrases like “career development” and “capable of handling,” which suit a formal request. However, the range is limited by repetition of “company,” “want,” and “capable,” and some expressions are imprecise or awkward, including “show and express myself through editing videos” and “more than just a video editor.” Choose more specific language to describe transferable skills and the value you could bring to IT. For example, explain how editing has developed your attention to detail or ability to meet deadlines, rather than relying on broad claims.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple sentences and longer sentences with clauses, and the main message remains understandable. There are, however, several errors in these more complex structures. In “I graduated as a Informational Technology student,” the article and phrasing are incorrect; “I graduated in Information Technology” would be clearer. “It align for me” has an agreement and sentence-pattern problem, while “the companies website” needs a possessive form. The sentence beginning “I have been a video editor” also runs several ideas together, with punctuation that does not clearly separate them. Aim for shorter, controlled sentences and check articles, subject–verb agreement, and possessives.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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