Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays famous people are photographed by professional photographers everywhere they go. Some people say this is a good thing because the public are interested in their lives. Other people think that photographers are wrong to follow famous people.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In contemporary times, eminent personalities are often being captured by professionals to wherever they visit. Many people say it is a positive trend as it proliferates entertainment for many viewers who idealize them and follows their every other event. While others disagree as it not only hamper their personal space but also their families life. This essay would further examine both the perspectives to which my opinion is inclined towards giving space to celebrities by keeping boundaries and maintaining equilibrium by eradicating the negative influence prevalent in the society.

On the one hand, due to advent of social media, dedicated followers nowadays rely on every other update coming on their feed daily on numerous online platforms like Instagram, twitter, and several other channels. Many prominent stars does it to showcase and promote themselves in order to get more fame and success. Moreover, people love watching their paparazzi shoot so that they can imitate similar wear, accessories and whatever they carry on themselves in order to look vogue and flaunt it these days. Additionally, there are many youngsters who thrive to become actor and actress certainly wants to follow their admirable persona everywhere on the internet.

On the other hand, such instances can break sanity of well-known people lifestyle. Also, it can lead to creating unnecessary hype and competition among them which can become monotonous to watch after certain period of a time. In addition to it, the maximum users of social media are the youth of the country and any bad news related to their admirer can affect children mental being by disrupting their studies. To exemplify better, Sushant Singh Rajput, one of the famous celebrities of Bollywood industry was much in talk on every other news channels during Covid time due to his demise and large number of residences were affected by its large impact because of negative news spread by the media.

To recapitulate, means of entertainment shouldn’t be stopped but everything needs to be in moderation with a balance of positives and negatives. It is right of every other individual to live in salacity.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The essay addresses both viewpoints and provides a clear personal opinion in the introduction. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the first body paragraph discusses the public's interest, the second paragraph is less focused, shifting from the impact on celebrities to the impact on youth, and then to a specific example that is not fully integrated into the argument. The conclusion is also quite brief and introduces a new, slightly confusing term ('salacity') instead of summarizing the main points effectively. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that examples directly support the main argument rather than drifting into tangential topics.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'In addition to it' and 'To recapitulate.' Referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the final paragraph where the connection between the previous arguments and the concluding statement is weak. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but the flow between sentences could be smoother to achieve a higher band score.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with attempts at using more sophisticated terms like 'proliferates,' 'equilibrium,' and 'monotonous.' However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors. For example, 'hamper their personal space' should be 'invade their personal space,' and 'live in salacity' appears to be a misuse of the word (likely intended to be 'privacy'). These errors occasionally impede the precision of your argument. Expanding your vocabulary to include more natural collocations related to media and privacy would be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('Many prominent stars does it,' 'children mental being'), incorrect preposition usage ('to wherever they visit'), and awkward phrasing ('are often being captured'). Punctuation is generally functional, but the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article usage would significantly improve your accuracy.

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