Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays famous people are photographed by professional photographers everywhere they go. Some people say this is a good thing because the public are interested in their lives. Other people think that photographers are wrong to follow famous people.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In numerous rural areas, most of the individuals are staying alone. This situation create an issue regarding homesickness and weaken relationship bonds, whereas, teaching them the importance of family to encourage them for developing relationships.
One major reason is homesickness. When people are living alone for long time can cause the problem of lonelyness and they can suffer with mental health sometimes because they do not have anyone for communication. Another reason can be distance from family. If individuals are staying far away, it weaken the relationship bonds with their loved ones. When they visit rarely to their parents, it not only create small fights between them but also weaken their relationship bonds.
This problems can be tackled by teaching people about the importance of family. When they understand the value of loved ones in their life, they can stop feeling alone and stroger their relationship bonds. For instance, when individuals visit their parents once in a week and talk with them, it will remove their lonelyness after sharing everything and helps to stroger the family bonds. Even the problem of little fights can be solved.
In conclusion, Although living alone can cause the consequences regarding homesickness and weaken relationship bonds, but these can be tackled through teaching them the value of family. So that they make strong social connections.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 3.0
The response is completely off-topic. The prompt asks for a discussion on the ethics of paparazzi and celebrity photography, but the essay discusses the challenges of living alone and homesickness. Because the response fails to address the task requirements entirely, it cannot be scored higher than a Band 3 for Task Achievement. Additionally, the word count is 220 words, which is below the 250-word minimum requirement, further impacting the score. To improve, you must carefully read the prompt and ensure your arguments directly relate to the specific topic provided.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression. However, the connection between ideas is often mechanical, such as the repetitive use of 'Another reason' and 'This problems'. While the structure is clear, the lack of relevance to the prompt makes the overall coherence difficult to follow in the context of the task. The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate, such as the misuse of 'whereas' in the introduction, which does not logically connect the preceding clauses.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. Words like 'lonelyness' (spelled incorrectly as 'lonelyness' instead of 'loneliness') and 'weaken' are used multiple times. There is little evidence of a range of vocabulary appropriate for an academic essay. You rely on basic, everyday language, and there are several errors in word formation, such as 'stroger' (stronger). To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a wider variety of synonyms and more precise academic collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede communication. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('This situation create', 'it weaken', 'it not only create') and incorrect sentence structures. The range of grammatical structures is limited, consisting mostly of simple or poorly constructed complex sentences. Punctuation is generally functional, but the persistent errors in basic grammar, such as verb tense and pluralisation, indicate a need for significant improvement in foundational grammar skills.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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