Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays famous people are photographed by professional photographers everywhere they go. Some people say this is a good thing because the public are interested in their lives. Other people think that photographers are wrong to follow famous people.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In this modern world paparazzis follow the celebrities everywhere to click their pictures. Many believe that this serves the public interest as people love to learn about there personal lives. However, others view this as pure violation of celebretie's privet life, making it really hard for celebrities to enjoy there life without any disturbance. I fully agree with the later, everyone has the right to privacy in there life and it should not be displayed for everyone to watch.
To begin with, many people believe that this is good entertainment for people. By watching this pictures and videos of what one's favourite celebrity is doing, they get more insight in there personal life, there likes and dislikes. Furthermore, they get to learn more about there favourite celebrity for instnace, where they go to gym or what kind of food they like.
On the other hand, many people condemns this violation of privacy of famous people as it creates unnecessary anxiety for them.Because celebrities are always being followed by photogrphers they feel pressure to look always look and act media ready at all occacions.Which creates unncessary pressure on them, as a result, they can't even get coffee at cafe in peace without being surrounded by photograpres and camera flashes.
I personally believe that, everyone has the right to privacy in there life and it should not be on a display at all time for others to judge. Moreover, when photographers follows celebrities everywhere it create crowd at every place they go making it harder for celebrities to leave that places on time.
In conclusion, getting photos and videos of one's favourite celebrity can give them more insight into there life and could even be entertaining. I personally think that photographers should not show their privet life giving them there space to enjoy there life.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the public's interest in celebrity lives versus the negative impact on the celebrities' mental health. However, the development is somewhat repetitive. For instance, the points about privacy are mentioned in the introduction, the third paragraph, and the fourth paragraph without significant new depth. To reach a higher band, you should ensure each paragraph introduces a distinct, well-supported idea rather than restating the same point. The position is consistent throughout, which is a strength.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices like 'To begin with', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where referencing is unclear or repetitive. For example, the transition between the discussion of public interest and the negative impact on celebrities could be smoother. Additionally, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat basic; incorporating a wider variety of linking words and phrases would improve the overall flow and logical progression of your arguments.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. However, there are frequent spelling errors, such as 'paparazzis' (paparazzi), 'celebretie's' (celebrity's), 'privet' (private), and 'instnace' (instance). These errors are noticeable and detract from the professional tone of the essay. While you attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'violation of privacy' and 'media ready', the range is limited. To improve, focus on accuracy in spelling and try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations to demonstrate a broader lexical range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader. Common issues include subject-verb agreement, incorrect use of articles, and persistent confusion between 'there', 'their', and 'they're'. For example, you wrote 'there personal lives' instead of 'their personal lives' and 'there likes and dislikes' instead of 'their likes and dislikes'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing after commas and periods. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band score.
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