Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays famous people are photographed by professional photographers everywhere they go. Some people say this is a good thing because the public are interested in their lives. Other people think that photographers are wrong to follow famous people.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Famous people are often photographed everywhere, at thier workspace, home, these papparazies never miss a moment that they could capture.
There are many incidents where the private life of the celebrities got exposed to the public.Some celebrities like to shoecase their personal life whereas some do not . Its a matter that should be disscused and take neccesary steps on.
On one hand, there are people who make a living out of these celebrity photographs. Photographers who are often called as papparazies are the ones behind these pictures. Each picture sells for a good amount of money in the olden days. But as of todays modern world its uploaded to the internet and socialmedias. where the views and like on the picture decides the fortune. Most of the famous people has an personal team they push thier image into the public, creating more attention and demand in the world. There are marketing and advertising firms that offer these promotion for a said cost, These companies create fuss often to gain attention on thier client, as the more people clicks or likes the images and news the more money they make. Many young adults see the icons as an role model in thier life. Hoping to become like them in future.
On the other hand , ones personal life is being compromised. their photos and videos are being sold and shared around the world.
Ones personal life is shared into the general public without their consent. There many incidents, where the celebrities got victimised and that led to ending their lives. Many rich and famous people are being targeted with their private pictures and threatend in exchange for money. these pictures let the public know when and where about the certain celebrity, this makes them an easy target.
Here i neither disagree nor agree that famous peoples should get photographed during their private life. There are cons ans pros to this.
I conclude by saying that these matter should be discussed by the government.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, though the position is somewhat weak and late in appearing. The ideas are relevant, such as the economic motivation for paparazzi and the privacy concerns for celebrities. However, the development is inconsistent; for example, the mention of government intervention in the conclusion is a new idea that is not supported or explored. To reach a higher band, ensure that your position is clearly stated in the introduction and consistently maintained throughout the essay, with each body paragraph providing deeper analysis rather than just listing points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or missing. For instance, the transition between the discussion of marketing firms and the impact on young adults is abrupt. Additionally, there are issues with referencing; the use of 'these' and 'their' is sometimes ambiguous, making it difficult to track the subjects. Improving the use of linking words (e.g., 'consequently', 'furthermore', 'in contrast') would help create a smoother flow between sentences and paragraphs.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There are several spelling errors, such as 'thier' (their), 'papparazies' (paparazzi), 'shoecase' (showcase), and 'disscused' (discussed). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic terms like 'good amount of money' and 'famous people'. To improve, you should aim to use more sophisticated collocations and topic-specific terminology, such as 'public figures', 'invasion of privacy', or 'commercial exploitation', while ensuring accurate spelling throughout the text.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede readability. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Most of the famous people has'), incorrect pluralisation (e.g., 'socialmedias'), and missing articles. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage and spacing after punctuation marks. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy would significantly improve the quality of your writing.
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