Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graphics illustrates the numbers of population in New York City between 1800 to 2000. The second and third table depicts alterations in the cities population in the five districts such as Manhatten, brookln, bronx, Queens, Staten Island within same period.

As we attain the significant changes in New York City has increased approximately [redacted phone] during 2000 year in contrast to so low indicaion in 1800 year there population illustration shows even less than 100 in latest research. In addition Comparing other districts within in Manhatten.The table demonstrate different percentage of total population. For instance, we possible to see that in both 2000 year , each of population percentage .ve a extremely changes such as 81% and 19 %.But population numbers are related to their indication. Therefore, In tables shows different districts changes dependend on human population

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the broad topic and mentions the 2000 population and the 81%/19% split, but it reports very little of the tables accurately or clearly. The statement that New York had “approximately 8000000” in 2000 is broadly correct, yet the claim that the 1800 population was “less than 100” confuses the total of 79,216 with a much smaller figure. There is no clear account of the overall rise from 79,216 to 8,009,185, or of Manhattan’s population peaking in 1900 before falling by 2000 while the other districts grew. The response is also below the required 150 words. Select the main trends and support them with accurate figures and comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to introduce the tables and then discuss population changes, but the ideas are not arranged in a coherent progression. The opening refers to the subject, while the next paragraph shifts abruptly from the city total to district percentages and then ends with the vague statement that changes “dependend on human population.” Connections such as “In addition” and “Therefore” do not make the relationships between these points clear, and “In addition Comparing other districts within in Manhatten” is difficult to follow. Use a clear sequence: introduction, overview of the main trends, then specific comparisons. Separate these functions into paragraphs and use linking words only where they accurately show the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant topic vocabulary, including “population,” “districts,” “percentage,” and “in contrast,” so the subject is recognisable. However, the range is basic and several inaccurate or awkward choices strain understanding. Examples include “numbers of population,” “low indicaion,” “latest research,” and “each of population percentage .ve a extremely changes.” Some district names are misspelled or inconsistently capitalised, including “Manhatten” and “brookln.” Aim for precise, natural collocations such as “total population,” “population share,” and “the population increased/decreased.” Check spelling and avoid vague expressions such as “indication” when a specific figure or trend can be named.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, but frequent errors in sentence construction and agreement make several statements hard to interpret. For example, “The graphics illustrates” has a subject–verb agreement error, and “The second and third table depicts” has the same problem. The phrase “between 1800 to 2000” uses an incorrect preposition pattern, while “As we attain the significant changes in New York City has increased” does not form a complete, clear clause. Articles, plurals, and punctuation are also inconsistently controlled. Build accurate short sentences first, then add comparisons using structures such as “while” or “whereas.” Proofread each sentence for a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and tense.

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