Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The first table illustrates about total population of New York city from year [redacted phone] while second and third table demonstrates that on what extent population in all five districts change over the same time period.

Overall, in 2000 population was at the peak however in 1800 population level was low.When we observe population rate on district level it was also increased in 2000 as compared to other years.

Firstly, in upper table in year 1800,population rate were lowest that is 79,216, Moreover in 1900, its population rate were medium 3,437,202 while highest in 2000 that was 8,009,185.

Secondly, in district Manhattan total percentage population was grew in 1800 that is 76% although in 1900 and 2000 that was 54 and 19%.

In district Manhattan, population surged in 1900.

Thirdly, in other 4 districts of New York city percentage of total population had rose in year 2000 while drop in 1900 and 2000 that was 24 and 46%.

In other districts, population in 2000 was greatest among other years that was 6,471,089.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the overall rise in New York City’s population and include several relevant figures, including the totals for all three years. You also note Manhattan’s declining share and the growth of the other districts’ combined share. However, some comparisons are unclear or inaccurate: the other districts’ share did not “drop in 1900 and 2000”; it rose from 24% in 1800 to 46% in 1900 and 81% in 2000. The statement that Manhattan’s “total percentage population was grew in 1800” is also difficult to interpret, and the key contrast—that Manhattan’s population peaked in 1900 before falling by 2000—is only briefly mentioned. Select and explain the main trends more clearly, distinguishing population totals from percentages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details about the city total, Manhattan, and the other districts. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “Thirdly” help signal these sections. However, progression is limited because the details are presented as separate statements rather than developed comparisons, and some linking language is inaccurate or confusing. For example, “while drop in 1900 and 2000” contradicts the figures that follow, while the repeated “In district Manhattan” interrupts the flow. Group the information into clearer paragraphs and connect related changes—for instance, compare Manhattan’s falling share with the other districts’ rising share—to create a more coherent account.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing data, including “population,” “percentage,” “surged,” and “greatest,” so the topic is generally clear. However, the range is limited and several word combinations are unnatural or imprecise, such as “population rate,” “on what extent,” and “total percentage population.” These choices sometimes make it difficult to tell whether you mean a population count or a share of the city total. Repetition of “population” and “year” also reduces flexibility. Use standard data-reporting terms consistently, such as “population,” “proportion,” “accounted for,” and “rose/fell,” and choose verbs that accurately describe the direction of change.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “while” and a clause beginning “When we observe…”. However, errors are frequent, and some sentence structures make the intended meaning hard to follow. Examples include “second and third table demonstrates,” “population rate were lowest,” and “population was grew”; these show problems with agreement and verb forms. Missing or inconsistent articles and punctuation also appear in phrases such as “in year 1800,population” and “in 2000 population was at the peak however.” Aim first for accurate, complete sentences: for example, “The population was lowest in 1800” and “The other districts’ share rose to 81% by 2000.” Then add more varied structures once these patterns are secure.

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