Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This table Showes about the total population of new york city from 1800 to 2000 this table also show about the five district of populato n includeing Manhattan, etc so lets breakdown a table in he year of 1800 the population in new york is about 79216 and then ub 1900 this becomes [redacted phone] thich is a huge change and now in 2000 ithis becoms [redacted phone] which is a large change now lets see the districts of city which is manhattan. in this district the year of 1800 this population is 60515 and this becomes 76% and when we talk about 190 its becaomes [redacted phone] which is 54% and in 2000 its goes to [redacted phone] which is appromaxitly 19% now lets talk about other dictricts like Brooklyn,Bronx ,Queens And Staten Island on the year of 1800 this population is about 18701 which is 24% and in 1900 its becomes [redacted phone] and if we talk about 2000 this poppulation of othetr dictirict becomes [redacted phone] which is 81% meae a huge change on that musch time

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion4.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You report the main figures for all three years and cover both Manhattan and the combined other districts, with the values and percentages generally matching the tables. The clearest overall feature is present in your figures: the city’s population rose substantially, while Manhattan’s share fell and the other districts’ share grew. However, this overview is not stated clearly as a summary; the response mostly lists data and calls changes “huge” or “large.” The comparison that Manhattan’s population peaked in 1900 and then declined by 2000 is also not explained, and the opening description is difficult to follow. To strengthen the response, give a concise overview of the contrasting trends, then select and compare the most important figures rather than presenting them as a running list.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response follows a basic sequence from the city total to Manhattan and then the other districts, so readers can identify the broad topics being discussed. However, it is presented as one long, run-on paragraph, with little separation between the overview and supporting details. Repeated transitions such as “now lets see,” “when we talk about,” and “now lets talk about” make the progression mechanical, while phrases such as “this becomes” do not always make clear whether “this” refers to a population or a percentage. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and details, and connect comparisons directly—for example, contrast Manhattan’s falling share with the other districts’ rising share.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “total population,” “districts,” and “percentage,” and the reader can usually recognise the intended topic. However, the range is limited and several expressions are repetitive or imprecise: “huge change” and “large change” do not specify the direction or nature of the trend, while “this becomes” is an awkward way to introduce later figures. Numerous spelling errors, including “Showes,” “populato,” and “dictricts,” also reduce clarity and control. Aim for accurate, neutral reporting language and vary the verbs used to describe change. For example, describe the city total as rising and Manhattan’s share as declining, rather than relying on general evaluative phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts to report several figures in connected sentences, but sentence structures are mostly simple and frequently run together. Errors in verb forms and sentence construction appear in phrases such as “the population in new york is about 79216 and then … this becomes” and “in 2000 its goes to.” Missing or inconsistent punctuation makes boundaries between ideas unclear, particularly in the long opening sentence and the final sentence. These problems sometimes make the relationships between figures and years difficult to follow. Practise writing short, complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use accurate past-tense reporting forms such as “the population stood at” or “it rose to.” Then add a few controlled comparison clauses.

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