Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The table illustrates the changes in total population of New York City which include all five districts for example, Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island in the year 1800, 1900, 2000.

Overall there is drastic increase in the total population of New york city as in the year 1800 it was total population of 79216 however after ten decades the number increased to [redacted phone] which is increase of approximately 325% . Similarly the number also increased in next ten decades in 2000 it reached to [redacted phone] which is increase of approximately 220% .

In the year 1800, Manhattan district had highest proportion of population 60515 which was 76 % of total popolation , similarly in the year 1900 Manhattan district remained with the highest proportion of population [redacted phone] which was 54% of total population . However in the year 2000 the Manhattan district experienced decline in proportion of total population [redacted phone] which decreased to 19% of total population .

Other districts like, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island also played vital part in proportion of total population and they experinced increase over 300 decades . In year 1800 they had 18701 proportion of total population which is 24 % and after 100 decades the population in other disticts was more than Manhattan districts which was [redacted phone] which was 46% of total population . Similarly in year 2000 the other districts had highest proportion of population of 81% of total population of [redacted phone] number .

Overall the New York City experienced increase in its total population especiially in other districts the population increased the highest.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You cover the main changes and include the key figures for the city total, Manhattan and the combined other districts. The overview correctly identifies strong overall growth and the shift in population share away from Manhattan; the 2000 comparison is especially clear. Most figures match the tables. However, the percentage increases of “approximately 325%” and “approximately 220%” are inaccurate: the total rose by about 4,240% from 1800 to 1900 and about 133% from 1900 to 2000. Also, “over 300 decades” is not supported and conflicts with the stated 100-year intervals. This response already selects relevant features, but more precise comparisons and a clearer distinction between population totals and proportions would make the reporting more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a summary of the city total, and separate paragraphs for Manhattan and the other districts. The final sentence reinforces the main trend, and linking words such as “Overall,” “However” and “Similarly” help show relationships. At times, though, the progression becomes repetitive, particularly through repeated use of “Similarly” and repeated statements that population shares increased or declined. Some connections are also unclear: “which is increase of approximately 325%” does not clearly identify the comparison period, while “they had 18701 proportion” blurs the distinction between a population count and its share. Grouping the figures into more direct comparisons across years would make cohesion less mechanical and references easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary for describing data, including “total population,” “proportion,” “experienced decline” and “highest.” These choices generally communicate the main trends, and the response uses some variation rather than relying only on “increase.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “played vital part in proportion,” “had 18701 proportion,” and “increase over 300 decades.” Spelling errors, including “popolation,” “experinced,” “disticts” and “especiially,” are noticeable. Repetition of “population” and “proportion” also limits flexibility. Aim for precise terms such as “population share,” “accounted for,” and “rose by,” and check spelling and collocations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including contrast with “However” and clauses introduced by “which.” The main meaning is usually understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “there is drastic increase” needs an article, and “it was total population of 79216” has an incomplete grammatical pattern. In “which is increase of approximately 325%,” the article and verb form are problematic; “the Manhattan district experienced decline in proportion” also needs an article and a clearer sentence structure. Commas and spacing around figures and percentages are inconsistent, and several long sentences would benefit from clearer punctuation. Practise accurate article use and complete sentence patterns, while keeping comparisons in shorter, controlled clauses.

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