Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The table shows the total population of five districts in ayear 1800 and 2000 . over all in new york the lowest population in 1800 which 79,216 . In 1900 population is increasing high which is 3,437,202 . The highest population in five districts in 2000 thats are 8,009,185 . secondaly , In manhattan lowest population same as new york in 1800 which 60,515 approximately 76%. In manhattan highest population in 1900 about 54% . and last is in 2000 which is 1,538,096 that are 19%. While the other districts like Brooklyn, Bronx. Queens,Stateni island . all over the highest population in 2000 which is 6,471,089 which is approximately 81% and all over the lowest populatuon is in 1800 thats are 18,701 which is 24% . the middle type of population is 1900 . which is 1,587,109 which is 46% thats are almost mid size . Over all the tottaly highest ratio is in other district in 2000 which is 81%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You report several relevant figures accurately, including the city’s growth from 79,216 in 1800 to 8,009,185 in 2000, and the changing shares of Manhattan and the other districts. You also identify the key contrast that the other districts accounted for 81% of the total by 2000. However, the summary is only partly developed: it does not clearly state the overall pattern that Manhattan’s population rose to a peak in 1900 and then fell, while the other districts continued to grow. Some descriptions are unclear or misleading, such as calling Manhattan’s 1900 population “highest” without distinguishing its population count from its percentage share. A clearer overview and more precise comparisons would make the main features easier to understand.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The response follows a basic sequence, moving from the city total to Manhattan and then the other districts, so the reader can identify the broad topics being discussed. However, ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and the progression within sections is often difficult to follow. Connectors such as “secondaly,” “While,” and repeated uses of “which” do not consistently show how the figures relate. The final sentence repeats the 2000 share rather than drawing together the main trends. Group the information into an introduction, an overview, and focused detail paragraphs, and use comparisons such as “whereas” or “by contrast” to make relationships clearer.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “population,” “districts,” “percentage,” and “highest,” and the reader can generally recognise the subject of each section. However, the range is limited and several phrases are inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the intended comparison unclear. For example, “the middle type of population” and “almost mid size” do not clearly describe the 1900 figures, while “over all” is repeated without adding meaning. Spelling errors such as “secondaly,” “populatuon,” and “tottaly” also reduce accuracy. Use precise trend language and collocations, such as “accounted for,” “rose to,” and “declined,” and check spelling carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response attempts to report figures in several sentence forms, but most sentences rely on basic patterns and many are incomplete or inaccurately formed. For instance, “the lowest population in 1800 which 79,216” lacks a complete verb structure, and “In manhattan highest population in 1900” is missing an article and a clear subject–verb construction. Tense and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent, as in “The highest population in five districts in 2000 thats are 8,009,185.” These errors frequently make relationships between figures harder to follow. Practise complete comparative sentences, for example, “Manhattan’s population peaked at 1,850,093 in 1900, then fell to 1,538,096 by 2000,” and use punctuation to separate ideas.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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