Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-07-24
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The first table depicts in the total proportion of New York city between 1800 and to 2000.
The second and third tables illustrate changes in the population of five district of the
city.
Overall, it is quite evident that the most significant change occured in 2000. Population
of other districts were increased notably.
To begin with all five districts, Population of New York city stood at 79,216 and its
percentage was 76%, which was a followed by a gradual rise to 2,437,185 in 1900,
reaching 54%. In 2000, the population of New York surged, accounting for 8,009,185.
Regarding Manhattan, there were only 60,515 people resided in 1800. After a massive
grow to 1,850,093 in 1900, the population of Manhattan dropped to 1,538,096 in 2000,
at 19%.
Moreover, population of other districts were 18,701 in 1800, and there were 24% of New
York total population. The proportion of population of other districts rose to 46% in
1900, and population were around 1,587,109. There were a massive change in
population in 2000, representing nearly, 6,471,089, and there were 81% of total
population.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response covers the main features of the provided tables, including the overall population growth and the trends for Manhattan and the other districts. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. The student identifies the key figures but struggles to make meaningful comparisons between the districts or explain the data trends clearly. The distinction between the 'total population' and the 'other districts' is slightly confusing in the presentation. To improve, ensure that the data is grouped more logically and that the relationship between the total and the parts is clearly articulated. The overview is present but could be more analytical regarding the shifting proportions over the two centuries.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate, such as the transition 'To begin with all five districts,' which does not logically introduce the subsequent data. Referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly when discussing the 'other districts' category. While the progression of ideas is generally logical, the flow between sentences could be smoother. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus would enhance the overall coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors. For example, 'depicts in the total proportion' is incorrect; 'depicts the total population' would be better. Similarly, 'massive grow' should be 'massive growth,' and 'people resided' is grammatically awkward in this context. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic descriptors. To reach a higher band, the student should focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing, such as the frequent use of 'population of' at the start of sentences.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'population of other districts were increased'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward sentence construction (e.g., 'which was a followed by a gradual rise'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would significantly improve the accuracy of the writing.
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