Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-07-26
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The provided three tabular charts illustrate the alternations of the total population of New York City and five districts of the city between 1800 to 2000.
Overall, it is clear that Population of New Yard City increased drastically with time, and other districts followed the inclement, whereas, in Manhattan was only one district in which the proportion of the population were decreased .
The first table depicts , in 1800, New Yard City's population was only 79,216, however it was rose significantly upto 3,437,202 by 1900. There was a considerable change of population in 2000 , which accounted for 8,009,185.
Moving Further to second table, Manhattan District had 60,515 citizens which was 76% of the total during 1800 and the counting reached at 1,538,096 in 2000,while, the percentage was dropped to 19%.
The population of other districts such as Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island was merely 18,701, 24% of the total Proportion in 1800. After a century, the percentage of total occupants was rose almost double. By following the same trend , there was a dramatic incline in the counting of people ,6,471,089 in 2000.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
You have successfully identified the main trends, such as the overall population growth and the shift in proportions between Manhattan and the other districts. You included relevant data points to support your descriptions. However, the response could be improved by providing a more precise comparison of the districts in the final paragraph. While you mention the other four districts collectively, breaking down the growth of individual districts like Brooklyn or Queens would have provided a more comprehensive overview of the data provided in the tables. Ensure that all data points are accurately transcribed, as there were minor inconsistencies in the figures mentioned.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'whereas', 'however', and 'moving further to', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the final paragraph where the connection between the percentage and the total count could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different data sets, which helps the overall flow of the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'drastically', 'considerable', and 'dramatic incline'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'alternations' instead of 'changes', 'inclement' instead of 'increase', and 'counting of people' instead of 'population figures'. Additionally, there are spelling errors like 'New Yard City' instead of 'New York City'. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic collocations and ensuring accurate spelling of proper nouns.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'it was rose significantly' (incorrect passive/tense usage), 'proportion of the population were decreased' (subject-verb agreement), and 'percentage of total occupants was rose' (incorrect verb form). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces before commas. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focusing on verb tense consistency and subject-verb agreement will significantly improve your accuracy.
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