Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The table below illustrates changes in the overall population of newyork city from 1800 to 2000.The other tables also demonstrates changes in the popoulation of five given districts city.Overall, New York city population had increased over the years.It had a huge difference between 1800 to 2000.The other bother also show the increased of population by the and of 2000.
In terms of population,Newyork recorded 79,126 population in 1800.Newyork stood at 3,437,202 in 1900.While new york experinced a magnificant rise around 8,[redacted phone] by the end of period.
Morover, Manhattan population between 1800 to 1900 moderatily increases from 60,515to 1,850,093.However, percentage of total population Manhattan declined from 76 per to 54 per.Manhattan population and per of popuplation also slightly dercreased in 2000.Whenever , Other districts ranked 18,701 population to 24 per in 1800.We had been witnessed a considerable rise during the perion of 19s.At the end, reamaining districts population and percentage of total increased from 6,471,089 to 81 per
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response attempts to address the task by summarizing the population data for New York City and its districts. However, the report lacks precision and clarity. While it identifies the overall growth trend, the data points provided are often inaccurate or poorly presented (e.g., '8,009185'). The comparison between districts is confusing, particularly the attempt to describe percentage shifts, which lacks logical flow. The response fails to clearly highlight the most significant trends or make meaningful comparisons between the districts, which is essential for a high band score in Task 1. The information is presented in a fragmented manner, making it difficult to follow the development of the data over the two-century period.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression of ideas is weak. Cohesive devices are used, but they are often misused or mechanical, such as the awkward transition 'Whenever ,' and the repetitive use of 'The other tables'. Referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult for the reader to track which district or time period is being discussed. The paragraphing is present but does not effectively group related information, leading to a disjointed reading experience. The lack of clear signposting between the general population data and the specific district data hinders the overall coherence of the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary range is limited and repetitive. There are frequent errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'popoulation', 'experinced', 'magnificant', and 'dercreased'. The student struggles to use precise terminology to describe statistical trends, relying on simple phrases like 'huge difference' or 'considerable rise'. The misuse of 'per' instead of 'percent' or 'percentage' significantly impacts the clarity of the data reporting. To improve, the student needs to focus on accurate spelling and the use of more sophisticated vocabulary related to data analysis, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'proportion'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('The other tables also demonstrates'), incorrect verb tenses ('We had been witnessed'), and sentence structure. Punctuation is also problematic, with missing spaces after periods and commas. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, these are often faulty and lead to confusion. The majority of sentences contain errors, and the control over basic grammar is inconsistent. The student should focus on mastering simple sentence structures before attempting more complex ones to ensure accuracy.
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