Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-07-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The table provides informations about the changes in total population New York City between 1800 and 2000. Another tables illustrate changes in the population of the five districts of the city over the period.
Examining the details of the Manhattan inhabitant's . The proportion of the residents of Manhattan was declined throughout the period, ranging from the 76% in 1800 to 19% in 2000, indicating a sharp fell.
However, other districts such as a Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island was noted significant growth over the period. In 1800, the residents of the this districts was around 18,701. After a decades, it rose dramatically at 6,471,089, it accounted 81% in population.
The population of New York City plummeted by 8,009,185 in 2000, experiencing a peak level.
Overall, the inhabitants of the New York City had been rose significantly in all five districts. Although Manhattan recorded the lowest figure, it eventually overlook by other districts.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the task by summarizing the population changes in New York City and its districts. However, the analysis is inconsistent. While you identify the decline in Manhattan's proportion, the description of the other districts is confusing. You state the population of the other districts was 18,701 in 1800 and rose to 6,471,089, but the data interpretation is flawed, and the claim that the total population 'plummeted' by 8,009,185 is factually incorrect based on the provided tables. The summary lacks a clear overview of the main trends, and the data reporting is inaccurate in several places, which hinders the clarity of the report.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive feature. However, the logical progression is weak. The transition between the general population and the specific districts is abrupt. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'However' and 'Overall', but they are sometimes used incorrectly or do not effectively link the ideas. For instance, the transition from discussing Manhattan to the other districts lacks a clear comparative structure. The referencing is also problematic, as it is not always clear which data points are being compared, making the flow of information somewhat disjointed.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate. There are several errors in word choice and form, such as 'informations' (uncountable), 'inhabitant's' (incorrect possessive), and 'sharp fell' (incorrect noun form). You also use 'overlook' incorrectly in the final sentence. While you attempt to use some descriptive language like 'plummeted' and 'dramatically', these are often misused or applied to the wrong data points. To improve, focus on using precise terminology for describing trends, such as 'proportion', 'percentage', and 'growth', and ensure you are using the correct word forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'Another tables illustrate' and 'districts was noted'. Articles are frequently misused or omitted, for example, 'the Manhattan inhabitant's' and 'a Brooklyn'. Sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in errors, such as 'it accounted 81% in population' and 'inhabitants of the New York City had been rose'. Improving your control over basic sentence construction and verb tenses is essential for a higher score.
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