Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-07-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The three tables illustrate the information population of New York city , including some changing from 1800 to 2000, and the population of five district of the city over tha same period.
Overall, it is evident that the individuals in the New york city is increasing. In 2000, Population has been dramatically rose. Additionally, Manhattan had highest percentage of the individuals of the total in 1800. In Contrast, lowest percentage of population in 2000. In other Districts , maximum percentage pf the total counted in 2000.
Looking first on the first table cleared that number of population are increasily constantly start from 79,216 individuals in 1800 to[redacted phone] in 1900 and then grew up to [redacted phone] in 2000. Moreever in Manhathan, the percentage of the population are decreasing accounted as 76% in 1800 and only 19% percent in 2000, From 60,515 to 1,538,096 in number of pupolation.
In other districts, the propotion of total population is increasing ,started from 24% with the population of 18,701 to 81% with the population of [redacted phone]. Additionally, In 1900, the number of citizens counted as 46% of total population with the fugure of 1,587,109.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response covers the main features of the data, including the overall population growth and the shift in population distribution between Manhattan and the other districts. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you correctly identify the trends, the description of the data is occasionally imprecise, such as the confusing phrasing regarding the 'lowest percentage' in 2000. To reach a higher band, ensure that all figures are accurately transcribed and that comparisons are more clearly articulated. The overview is present but could be more effectively integrated to highlight the most significant trends rather than just stating that numbers increased.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as 'Looking first on the first table cleared that'. There are also issues with referencing; for example, the transition between the general population and the specific district data is abrupt. While the logical progression is generally clear, the lack of sophisticated linking words and the occasional awkward phrasing mean that cohesion is not always managed effectively.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for a higher score. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'individuals in the New york city is increasing' (referring to population size rather than individuals) and 'fugure' (spelling error). You rely on basic descriptors like 'increasing' and 'highest'. To improve, try to incorporate more varied terminology related to data description, such as 'surged', 'proportion', 'decline', or 'fluctuation', and ensure that collocations are accurate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('Population has been dramatically rose'), incorrect preposition usage ('Looking first on the first table'), and punctuation errors with numbers (e.g., '2.437.202'). While the meaning is generally conveyed, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like tense consistency and article usage.
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