Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The first table depicts information about the total population in all five districts in New York City between 1800 to 2000 and the other two tables illustrate about the changes in the population in the same years.
Overall,it is clear that the maximum population was seen in 2000 in all five districts as compare to other ones whereas in Manhattan and other districts less population was observed in the year of 2000 and 1800.
After analyzing the first table,it is evident the population was on the peaked in 2000 which was 8,009,185,followed by 3,437,202 in 1900 and very less amount of people was seen in 1800 that was 79,216.
Furthermore,the proportion of total population in Manhattan were 76% and population was 60,515 in 1800 whereas the population was changed in the year of 1900 and 2000 which were 54% and 19% respectively.Apart from this, in 2000 the population changed in other districts was 81% while it decreased by half from 2000 in 1900 and only 24% of people was seen in 1800 in other districts.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers the main features of the data, such as the overall population growth and the shift in proportions for Manhattan versus other districts. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. The description of the data is occasionally confusing, particularly in the final paragraph where the interpretation of percentages is unclear and mathematically difficult to follow. While the main trends are identified, the lack of precision in reporting the data points and the slightly muddled comparison between the years 1800, 1900, and 2000 prevent a higher score. To improve, ensure that data points are clearly linked to the correct years and categories.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. There is an attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'After analyzing', and 'Apart from this'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the comparison between years and districts is muddled. The logical progression is present but hindered by awkward phrasing and imprecise connections between the data sets. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would enhance the overall coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. There are several instances of awkward word choices, such as 'very less amount of people' and 'population was on the peaked'. These errors, while not impeding communication entirely, demonstrate a limited control over collocations and word forms. To reach a higher band, you should focus on using more sophisticated reporting verbs and precise quantifiers, such as 'a significant increase' or 'a substantial proportion', rather than relying on basic descriptors like 'very less'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response uses a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('the proportion... were 76%'), incorrect preposition usage ('in the year of 1900'), and awkward phrasing ('population was changed'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas. While the meaning remains understandable, these errors are frequent enough to distract the reader. Focusing on basic sentence construction and ensuring correct verb tenses when describing historical data will help improve the accuracy of your writing.
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