Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The table illustrates the overall changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. and population changes over the same period for the other five districts (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island)
Overall, In 2000, the New York City has the highest population with a figure of 8,009,185. then 2000 year followed by 1900 with a population of 3,437,202. Lastly, only around 79,216 people lived in New York City in 1800, making it the least populated year shown.
In 1900, Manhattan accounted for a significantly high percentage(54%) of total population at 1,850,093. whereas, In the same year other districts (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) had total of population 1,587,109 which is less as compared to Manhattan. In 2000, other five districts together holds more population (6,471,089) with a total of 81% percentage as compared with Manhattan. In 1800, the populations of Manhattan and the other districts were comparatively low, at 60,515 and 18,701 respectively.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses the task by summarizing the population data for NYC and its districts. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you identified the total population in 2000 and 1800, the description of the trends for individual districts is limited. You grouped the other four districts together rather than highlighting the distinct growth patterns of specific areas like Brooklyn or Queens, which are key features of the data. To improve, ensure you select and compare the most significant data points rather than just listing figures. The overview is present but could be more analytical regarding the shift in population distribution over the two centuries.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate. For example, the sentence 'and population changes over the same period...' is a fragment and lacks a proper connection to the previous sentence. Additionally, the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is abrupt. Using more varied linking words such as 'consequently,' 'in contrast,' or 'furthermore' would improve the flow. The referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly when referring to 'other districts' as a collective group, which obscures the specific data provided in the tables.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. You rely on basic terms like 'highest population,' 'total,' and 'less.' There are also some awkward phrasings, such as 'holds more population' and '2000 year followed by 1900,' which are not natural collocations. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to data description, such as 'experienced significant growth,' 'accounted for the majority,' or 'a substantial increase.' Spelling is generally accurate, but the phrasing needs more refinement to sound professional.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Issues include incorrect punctuation (e.g., '2000. and population'), subject-verb agreement errors (e.g., 'the New York City has'), and awkward sentence construction (e.g., 'then 2000 year followed by 1900'). The use of articles is also inconsistent. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors limits the score. Focusing on proofreading for basic sentence structure and article usage will help improve your accuracy significantly.
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