Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The table chart presentation elucidates information about changes in the total population of New York City in different years. At a first glance, it can be promptly noticed that there was the sum population New York City increment.
From the given statistics, it is apparent that the changes in the whole population in Manhattan of population initialised at 76% in 1800. The changes in the total population and as percentage of Manhattan experienced a drop of 54% in 1900, after which it saw collepse of 19% from 2000.
On the other hand, There was vast growth 24% to 81% in the whole others districts of total population of queens, Island in 1800 to 2000.
The major conclusion that can be the whole population in different districts in different year highest was 2000 and lowest was1800.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have attempted to identify some trends, the analysis is fragmented and lacks a clear overview of the data. You have not effectively compared the districts or provided a comprehensive summary of the population changes across the two centuries. The data interpretation is also confusing; for instance, stating that Manhattan experienced a 'collepse' of 19% from 2000 is inaccurate based on the provided tables. To improve, ensure you cover all parts of the prompt, provide a clear overview, and support your points with accurate data points from the tables.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response lacks logical progression. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the ideas within the paragraphs are disjointed and difficult to follow. Cohesive devices are used in a mechanical and often incorrect way, such as the awkward transition 'On the other hand, There was vast growth'. The referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult for the reader to understand which data points relate to which districts. To improve, focus on using linking words more naturally and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus that contributes to the overall summary of the data.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary range is limited and often inaccurate. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'collepse' (collapse) and 'initialised' (started/began). The phrasing is often unnatural, such as 'sum population New York City increment'. The lack of precise terminology to describe trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable') makes the report less professional. To improve, focus on learning collocations related to data description and ensure you use words that accurately reflect the trends shown in the charts rather than inventing terms that do not fit the context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with sentence structure, such as 'The major conclusion that can be the whole population in different districts in different year highest was 2000 and lowest was1800', which is ungrammatical and lacks a clear verb. There are also errors in article usage, pluralization, and prepositional phrases (e.g., 'in the whole others districts'). The range of structures is very limited, relying mostly on simple, error-prone sentences. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and proofreading for common errors in tense and word order.
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