Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The table compares the population changes over the period from 1800 to 2000 in New York City and other key five districts cities including Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island.
Overall, New York City population increased significantly over the two hundred period, while Manhattan population proportion decreased drastically. Whereas, other four cities managed to rose the population growth considerably.
Regarding New York City, in 1800 population was 79,216, and next hundred year population increased massively up to 3.4 millions. and next century it doubled to 8 Million in 2000.
Furthermore, initially Manhattan was contributed 76% population in 1800 while others four cities only contributed 24%, Meanwhile, in 1900 Manhattan population porportion came down to 54% while othe districts maximized the proportion up to 46%, which was nearly doubled the growth when it compared with previous period of 1800. In 2000 Manhattan population portion plunged to 19% and population decreased from 1.8 million to 1.5 million over the last hundred years. In contrast, other districts rocketed their population growth substancially from 1.6 Million to 6.5 Million rounding to nearest thousands.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response covers the main features of the data, including the overall population growth of NYC and the shifting proportions among the districts. You successfully identified the key trends, such as the decline in Manhattan's population share and the significant growth in the other districts. However, the report could be improved by being more precise with the data. For example, stating that the population 'doubled to 8 Million' in 2000 is inaccurate based on the provided table (which shows 8,008,278). Additionally, the term 'districts cities' is slightly confusing as these are boroughs. Overall, the main trends are clear, but the accuracy of the data reporting needs more attention to reach a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is generally clear. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'Meanwhile', and 'In contrast' to link your points. However, some transitions are used awkwardly, such as 'Whereas, other four cities managed to rose the population growth considerably', which is grammatically incorrect and disrupts the flow. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the internal cohesion within sentences is sometimes hindered by grammatical errors, making the text feel slightly mechanical at times.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the main trends, using terms like 'proportion', 'drastically', 'plunged', and 'rocketed'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations. For example, 'Manhattan was contributed' should be 'Manhattan contributed', and 'other districts maximized the proportion' is not the most natural way to describe an increase in share. There are also minor spelling errors like 'porportion' and 'substancially'. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and ensure spelling accuracy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. Examples include 'managed to rose' (should be 'managed to raise' or 'saw a rise'), 'next hundred year population increased' (missing articles), and 'when it compared with' (should be 'when compared with'). While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors—particularly with verb tenses and articles—prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will significantly improve your accuracy.
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