Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The given table depicts the information of total population of New York city in year between 1800 and 2000, the other two tables illustrate changes in citizenship of the five different districts of the city in the similar periods.
Overall, it can be derived that the majority of population changes and also the highest population in the later year whereas, the lowest in former year.
Initially, in 1800, total 60515 population in Manhattan which was the highest than Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island(18701), as well as population changes at 76% and 24%, respectively. Additionally, after a decade the population changes 46% in other districts which was 8% lower than Manhattan. In the end of year, only 19% population changes in Manhattan which was inclined by 81% in others and the overall population was also rise compare to Manhattan .
Furthermore, In new York city total community including five districts, the population trend follow increasing by the year, 79216 in 1800, [redacted phone] in 1900 and in year 2000, it was rose at [redacted phone].
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to address the task but fails to clearly communicate the data. While it mentions the total population and the five districts, the interpretation of the figures is highly inaccurate and confusing. For example, the statement regarding '76% and 24%' population changes is not supported by the provided tables. The summary of trends is disjointed, and the key features—such as the massive growth in Queens or the decline in Manhattan's relative share—are not highlighted. The response lacks a clear analytical focus, making it difficult for the reader to understand the actual demographic shifts described in the tables.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as 'In the end of year' and 'In new York city total community'. Referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult to follow the comparison between Manhattan and the other districts. The transition between the general population trends and the district-specific data is abrupt. While there is an attempt to structure the response, the lack of clarity in how ideas are linked significantly hinders the flow of information.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is limited and often inappropriate for an academic report. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'citizenship of the five different districts' (instead of population) and 'inclined by 81%' (instead of increased). The phrase 'total community including five districts' is imprecise. The student relies on basic vocabulary and struggles to express numerical data accurately, which impacts the precision of the report. To improve, the student should focus on using specific terminology related to data description, such as 'proportion', 'fluctuation', and 'demographic'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('population trend follow', 'it was rose'), article usage ('in year 2000'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack necessary prepositions, such as 'total 60515 population in Manhattan'. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are often faulty, leading to confusion. The student needs to focus on basic sentence construction and ensure that verb tenses are used consistently when describing historical data.
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