Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given data depicts the change in the population of New York city from 1800 to 2000. The other following data shows change in the population of the sub five districts of the New York city which are Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, queens, Staten Island in that same two centaury. Overall, the population was the highest in 2000s and particularly in the other districts and the Manhattan was at the bottom.
To begin with, in New York the population was rock bottom in 1800s around 79,216 eventually facing a rise in 1900s by reaching 3,437,202. Fortunately, in early 2000s it skyrocketed by ending up at 8,009,185.
however, going even dipper in the data the Manhattan held 76% in 1800 which is 60,515 and the rest 24% in other districts by 18,701. in the 1900 both Manhattan and the other districts were almost equal by 54% and 46% also by 1,850,093 and 1,587,109 which is quite impressive compared to previous centaury. in 2000 the other districts had an upper hand by 81% which is 6,471,089 in total and Manhattan at 19% which is the lowest among all the pervious years by 1,538,096.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main trends in population growth and the shift in distribution between Manhattan and the other districts. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While the overall growth is noted, the specific data for the individual districts (Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) is completely ignored, despite being provided in the prompt. The summary focuses only on the aggregate 'other districts' category, which limits the depth of the response. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific comparisons between the districts rather than just grouping them together, as the prompt explicitly asks for information regarding the five districts.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression from the general population trend to the specific district distribution. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with', 'however', and 'in the 1900', though some are used slightly mechanically or with minor punctuation errors. The referencing is generally clear, but the transition between the general overview and the detailed data analysis could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction/overview from the body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, with some attempts at more descriptive language like 'skyrocketed' and 'upper hand'. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'sub five districts', 'pervious years', and 'dipper' (deeper). The use of 'rock bottom' is slightly informal for an academic report. While the range is sufficient to convey the main points, the errors in word choice and spelling occasionally distract the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the Manhattan', 'the New York city'), pluralisation ('two centaury'), and prepositions. Some sentences are slightly disjointed, such as 'in the 1900 both Manhattan and the other districts were almost equal by 54% and 46%'. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they are persistent throughout the text, preventing the response from reaching a higher band.
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