Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The provided first, second, and third table compare the changes of population during two centuries (1800 - 2000) across five district cities of New York : Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island.
Overall, the population of Manhattan droped significantly, whereas other district cities saw a rise in population, by the times (or percentage) Manhattan lost its population.
In the beginning of the period, total population of New York city was almost 80 thousand (79,216), comparing to Manhattan's population, it accounts for 76% of the total population. By the next century (1900), total population of Manhattan was 1,850,093, which accounts for 54% of the total population of New York (3,437,202).
It was a sharp decline of population of 22%. In year 2000, total population of New York and Manhattan were 8,009,185 and 1,538,096. And population of Manhattan fell by 35% compared to previous year.
In terms of the rest of the districts, by 1800, consensus recorded 18,701 population, recording 24% of the New Yorker. After this period, by 1900, percentage of population almost doubled (46%). It is a growth of 22% which was lost by Manhattan in 1900. At the end of the period, population of other districts grew significantly at about 81%, accounting 35% increase against previous year. Also that year, Manhattan lost same number of population which dramatically increased the population of the rest of the districts.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main trends, but the analysis is marred by significant inaccuracies in data interpretation. For instance, you state that Manhattan's population 'dropped significantly' overall, yet the data shows it grew from 60,515 in 1800 to 1,538,096 in 2000. You also misinterpret the 'rest of the districts' data by conflating them with a single 'consensus' figure. The comparison between percentages and absolute numbers is confusing, and the claim that Manhattan 'lost' population in 2000 compared to the 'previous year' is factually incorrect based on the provided table, which shows decadal data. To improve, ensure you accurately read the table values and distinguish between absolute population growth and percentage share changes.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the logical progression is hindered by confusing transitions and unclear referencing. Phrases like 'by the times (or percentage)' and 'consensus recorded 18,701 population' are vague and do not clearly link the data points. While there is an attempt to use cohesive devices, they are often used inaccurately, making the relationship between the figures difficult to follow. Improving the use of linking words such as 'consequently,' 'in contrast,' or 'furthermore' would help clarify the logical flow between your observations.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is limited and occasionally imprecise. You rely on basic terms like 'droped' (spelling error: dropped), 'rise', and 'growth'. There are also issues with word choice, such as using 'consensus' instead of 'census' and 'district cities' which is not standard terminology for New York boroughs. The expression 'New Yorker' is used incorrectly to refer to the total population count. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary, such as 'fluctuated', 'surged', 'proportion', and 'demographic shift', and ensure you use terminology appropriate for describing statistical data.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'total population... were'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'by the times (or percentage)'). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence structure often feels disjointed. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that your verb tenses are consistent when describing historical data. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles ('the' total population) and spelling mistakes will also help improve your score.
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