Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The tabular data demonstrate about total population of New York in addition to that it also illustrate the changes in population in five district of city from year 1800 to 2000.
Overall, there was consistent rise in population in overall New York city. However district like Manhattan, it show a fall in percentage of population. As there was consistent rise in total population in other 4 district that was Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island.
In 1800 overall population was 79,216 and among that 76% population is in Manhattan district which was 60,515 people, while in other 4 districts around 18,701 people which was around 24% of total population.
Moreover in the year 1900 the population of New York city rose to 3,437,202. But compare to previous year, Manhattan show a fall in percentage which was 54% means around 1,850,093 although its higher than the other districts which was 46% around 1,587,109 population.
By 2000 the city population rose to 8,009,185 whereas a drastic fall in Manhattan district's population was observed, which was 19% among total population means around 1,538,096 people. On other hand in other district there was around 6,471,089 people means 81% of total population.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the data, including the overall population growth and the shifting distribution between Manhattan and the other four districts. However, the analysis is somewhat repetitive and lacks a clear, cohesive overview. While you successfully identified the key trends, the presentation of the data is occasionally imprecise, such as stating 'Manhattan show a fall in percentage' without clearly contrasting it against the absolute population figures, which actually increased over the period. To reach a higher band, ensure that you not only report the numbers but also synthesize the information to highlight the most significant changes more effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of time. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate. For example, the phrase 'in addition to that it also illustrate' is clunky, and the transition 'But compare to previous year' is grammatically weak. Referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly when referring to 'other 4 district' without naming them consistently. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would significantly improve the flow of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. You rely on basic verbs like 'show', 'rose', and 'fall' repeatedly. There are also some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'demonstrate about' (should be 'demonstrate') and 'in other district' (should be 'in the other districts'). To improve, try to incorporate more varied reporting verbs and descriptive adjectives to characterize the trends, such as 'experienced a significant decline' or 'witnessed a steady upward trajectory'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('Manhattan show', 'data demonstrate'), missing articles ('in five district'), and awkward phrasing ('means around 1,850,093'). While the meaning is generally clear, these errors are persistent. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that plural nouns are correctly identified. Increasing the variety of complex sentence structures while maintaining accuracy will help move your score up.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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