Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
As we can observe from the table that in new york the population gradually increased in 1900 but there was a sudden growth in 2000 which may be due to several reasons as due to migration or breeding for the growth of city. In Manhattan we can observe massive growth in 1900 but a gradual growth in 2000 which is due to crime or several reasons. Now we can observe in other districts that there is a massive rise in 1900 as well as in 2000. By comparing all the three we can observe that the rise in new york is massive and then in Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens etc. But in Manhattan there is a gradual growth there is not a huge rise in the population which can be due to several reasons and as New York is the capital that can be a solid reason that stand out about the massive growth and in other districts we can observe that there are many districts which can result in population growth.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to adequately report the data provided. You have included personal speculation about the causes of population growth (e.g., 'due to crime' or 'breeding'), which is not supported by the data and is inappropriate for an Academic Task 1 report. Furthermore, the summary lacks precision; you mention 'massive growth' and 'gradual growth' without referencing the actual figures from the tables. To improve, you must focus solely on describing the trends using the provided numbers and avoid adding external opinions or subjective interpretations. The overview is also missing, as you have not clearly identified the overall trend across the two centuries.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is written as a single paragraph, which makes it difficult to follow. There is a lack of logical progression between ideas. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'Now we can observe' and 'By comparing all the three', they are used in a repetitive and mechanical way. The referencing is often unclear, particularly when you refer to 'other districts' without naming them or specifying which data points you are comparing. To improve, you should structure your response into clear paragraphs: an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs that group data logically.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. You frequently use the word 'growth' and 'massive' to describe trends, which does not demonstrate the range required for a higher band. There are also issues with word choice, such as 'breeding' to describe population increase, which is inappropriate in this context. The lack of precise terminology for describing data trends (e.g., 'surged', 'fluctuated', 'remained stable') limits the effectiveness of your report. You should aim to use a wider variety of verbs and adverbs to describe the changes shown in the tables.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with sentence structure, such as run-on sentences and a lack of proper punctuation. For example, the opening sentence is a fragment starting with 'As we can observe...'. There is also a lack of complex sentence structures; most of your sentences are simple or poorly connected. You should focus on using a mix of sentence types and ensuring that your subject-verb agreement and punctuation are accurate. Proofreading for basic errors like capitalization of proper nouns (e.g., 'new york') is also essential.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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