Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The table graph provides the data of the cumulative population of New York City in the given period of 1800 to 2000 respectively, along with the variations in the population of five major districts namely Manhattan and Other cities including Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and Staten Island.
Overall, It is evident that the the the combined population in all the cities was highest in the year 2000 whereas, lowest in the year 1800. Although, the highest head count in Manhattan was in 1900 and in the year 2000 the population of other cities witnessed a threefold mount.
To begin with, it is noticeable that the percentage of Manhattan total population in 1800 was 76% with 60,515 individuals however, in the same year the percentage of other cities was only 24% with 18,701 counts. Moving towards 1900, the total population % was 54% which was 8% higher than the other cities, and the individual count was 1,850,093 and 1,587,109 individually. Highlighting the final year 2000, the total population stood at 19% with 1,538,096 head counts but for other cities like Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and Staten Island was surged to 81% which was 62% increase with 6,471,089 people.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers the main features of the data, including the overall population growth and the shift in distribution between Manhattan and the other districts. However, there are inaccuracies in the interpretation of the data. For instance, the claim that the population of other cities witnessed a 'threefold mount' is not clearly supported by the provided figures, and the description of the 1900 data is slightly confusing. While the main trends are identified, the analysis lacks precision in comparing the specific figures across the three time points. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are cited accurately and that comparisons are logically structured to highlight the most significant changes.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and a body paragraph. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moving towards', and 'Highlighting the final year' are used to guide the reader. However, there are some issues with cohesion; for example, the phrase 'the the the' in the second paragraph is a repetitive error that disrupts the flow. Additionally, the referencing of 'other cities' is slightly ambiguous as it groups four distinct districts together without clear distinction. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the mechanical nature of some transitions limits the score.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with terms like 'cumulative population', 'variations', and 'witnessed' used appropriately. However, there are some instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'threefold mount' and 'total population % was 54%'. The phrase 'head counts' is used repeatedly, which makes the writing feel somewhat repetitive. To improve, the student should aim for more varied synonyms for 'increase' or 'population' and ensure that collocations are natural. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey meaning, but lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including the repetitive 'the the the' and issues with subject-verb agreement and preposition usage (e.g., 'was surged to 81%'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are missing commas in complex sentences, such as after introductory phrases. While the errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to suggest a lack of control over more complex structures. Focusing on proofreading to eliminate minor slips and improving the accuracy of verb tenses would significantly enhance the quality of the writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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