Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given tables illustrate the residents of New York City, and the population of five districts of the city from 1800 to 2000.
Overall, it is clear that the number of residents recorded in 2000 was the highest, whereas the lowest population was noticeable in 1800. In addition, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island had the maximum percentage of population.
The highest number of all five districts population was recorded in 2000, 8,009,185, while the figure was decreased 3,437,202 residents in 1900. Moreover, the lowest population was noticeable in the year 1800, with 79,216 people.
In 1800, 60,515 population represented 76%. Furthermore, 54% of the population rose to 1,850,093 in 1900, while the proportion of population fell to 19% ,1,538,096 population. The percentage of other districts (Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) stood at 18,701, with 24% in 1800. The population of the other districts rose from 46% (1,587,109 residents) in 1900 to 81% (6,471,089 residents) in 2000.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main trends, but the analysis is inconsistent and confusing. While you identify the overall growth, the specific data points are often mislabeled or inaccurately described. For instance, you state that the population 'decreased' to 3,437,202 in 1900, which is factually incorrect based on the provided tables. Furthermore, the grouping of the four districts as 'other' is somewhat arbitrary and makes the comparison difficult to follow. To improve, ensure you clearly distinguish between the total population and the individual district data, and double-check your figures against the source material to ensure accuracy in your reporting.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The transition between the general overview and the specific data points is abrupt. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Moreover' and 'Furthermore', but they are sometimes used mechanically or to connect ideas that do not logically follow one another. The referencing is also unclear; for example, it is difficult to determine exactly which data set you are referring to in the final paragraph. Improving the use of signposting and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would significantly enhance the flow of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic descriptors like 'highest', 'lowest', and 'maximum'. There is some repetition of terms like 'population' and 'residents'. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more varied vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'peaked', 'surged', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a significant decline'. Additionally, there are some awkward phrasings, such as 'the figure was decreased', which should be corrected to 'the figure decreased' or 'a decrease was recorded'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'the figure was decreased 3,437,202 residents' is grammatically incorrect. There are also issues with punctuation and preposition usage, such as '19% ,1,538,096 population'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors suggests a lack of control over complex structures. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of passive voice for reporting data would help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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